Who am I?

I'm in my twenties and I really don't know who I am. I can list maybe 3 things about myself that don't change. I'm really struggling. I feel like a lost child. I feel like I'm 4 again right now. Nobody gets it. I'm afraid of everything.

If you find out could you point me in the right direction so I can find out who I am too?



XxX

Lilycat10 wrote:I'm afraid of everything.

David Bowie & Trent Reznor wrote:I'm afraid of Americans,
I'm afraid of the world.
I'm afraid I can't help it,
I'm afraid I can't.

Ladies, I think this is pretty much par for the course for anyone with BPD. I know it is for me. I would say that I constantly question myself, but I don't; most often, I initially believe that I can't, or that it will hurt me, or whatever the negative connotation is for that incident.

I know exactly what you mean about feeling like a lost child. I don't think I could've said it better, myself.

Some days I feel like the strongest woman in America for living my life.


Then, other days, I feel like the tiniest speck of nothing in the universe.


Does it make sense? Nope, not at all. But it is what it is.

I think trying new and different activities has helped me tremendously. And at first, while doing so, it helped to point out things to myself that I DIDN'T like, because then it narrowed things down a bit.

Not that it was the greatest advice ever, but that's all I've got on that one.

<3


AMP

It's very confusing. Hopefully one day you will be able to be consistent - although it is VERY hard with this condition - with what you like. I just say it helps to know who you WANT to be and what you admire in other people and then work from there. Try not to let your moods control you and live life moment by moment, baby steps, day by day. If you know you love (examples) music, love heavy metal, love being creative, love horror movies, love fantasy and THAT doesn't change no matter WHAT mood you're in that is definitely the first steps. And if you have the first step you have a starting point for the rest of the staircase, right?