Let me introduce myself

I picked the moniker TheEmptySpace at PsychForums because there has always been an empty space in me that I feel will never be filled.

I like lists. So here are some lists about me.

First, what's good about me?
1. Don’t punch people anymore
2. Don’t get road rage so much anymore
3. Have not lost current job…yet
4. I am searching for the meaning of my life
5. I value honesty
6. I try to be open minded
7. Willing to work hard
8. Love people when I don’t hate them
9. Like children better than adults
10. Sense of humor

Second, What am I highly effective at?
1) Annoying others
2) Entertaining myself by annoying others
3) Being annoyed/angry/pissed at everything/everyone
4) Scaring the hell out of other people
5) Wasting my money
6) Wasting my life
7) Being Brash
8. Overeating
9) Finding faults in everyone including me
10) Losing jobs
11) Giving up old friends
12) Giving up old hobbies
13) Cursing
14) Rationalizing my behavior
15) Making my life difficult
16) Driving fast
17) Pushing other people
18) Procrastinating
19) Placing Blame
20) Convincing fools to hire and pay me to be a terrible employee.
21) Being Depressed
22) Raging/Ranting
23) Avoiding responsibility
24) Coercing sex
25) Laying guilt trips on others

And for now the last list I'll share is what I've done to fix my broken brain.
· Self-discipline
· Follow others
· Christianity
· 12 step programs
· Self-help books
· Exercise
· Rx drugs
· Illicit drugs
· Lean on others
· Let anger and fear control me
· CBT…several different counselors
· Antidepressants
· Ignore problems
· Rage at the world


I think I may be BPD possibly Bipolar and undoubtedly have depression issues. I am going to an intake interview for dialectic behavioral therapy today. I currently take Fluoxetine and Lamotrigine. My IMO incompetent psychologist and IMO incompetent psychiatrist have not diagnosed or at least given me a diagnosis.

Anyway I hope to participate here and hope to find or provide something helpful.

TheEmptySpace

Hiiiii
and welcome.

Walrus face for you ;3