AAAARRRGGGH!!! *triggering

by **Rednal** » Sun Nov 06, 2011 7:05 pm

I've read that the one who wants the relationship most, has the least power in that relationship. Ive wondered if this is why I loose the interest of girlfriends, as I so desperately need that affection. Having this in mind, i try to act not so interested, but ultimately fail. I cant seem to hold back, even when i try.

yoa wrote:cbox...that's so nice of u...

it's about everything n everyone. these 2 days are such a roler coaster for me b/c none went right.
but yeah the last and most recent one is bout this f**n wedding.
it's not the 'nearly-30' crisis. though people will came across that about me.
i want to yell at them n say it's actually the 'nobody-wants-me-from-the-very-beginning' crisis.

i could've have sumone or could've married in my early 20th.
i'm not ugly though i'm not pretty...at least the word 'so so' won't be too much.
but nobody wants me (in my real world, not you here...i love u all)
it's not about the high standard i have towards man. frankly i don't have any standard.
they said i should unconditionally love and i did but they just run and choose anyone but me
the only man who wants me just loves to abuse me n i don't think it'll do me any favour anyway

they said i'm too good to be true, i'm too sweet, i'm too smart, i'm too perfect or...after months of date, they just simply said that they suddenly aware that i'm not their type...wtf that supposed to mean!!!??? it's not something they just get up in morning and have the idea that i'm not their type!

it's the BPD thing that they couldn't except. none of them even try to understand and reach me. none even asked what BPD means. for them, i'm just a psyco n that's it!
well...F** them!!

friend said i should consider being a 'happy' single. but i'm not happy. i don't want to be alone for my entire life.
another friend said it'll take thousands of time before i come to success, just like time when Graham bell invent the phone. but i don't think i'd like to try that many times when other people just get several times. i've lost count of how many man was in relationship with me. i can still count physical involvement though, b/c mostly just run in short time before things get physical.

but maybe i really should seriously consider the advice.

i often wonder how member here got married/was married, have kids, have partner...and i'm jealous!
i feel like i want to abduct someone and keep him...i'll be good. i'lll take good care of him...promise

anyone volunteer to be abducted?

First, I wanna say I'm really f**kin' offended by your constant use of the word F**k... so f**kin' offended that I bolded all the f**ks that you used. What the f**k is up with that?

Now that I know you're a girl I'm way more interested. Personally, I'd love to have a wife on every continent.. It would make for nice variety.

That said, being single and not having someone to share your life with does suck. I'm in that same boat with you. I wish there was a simple answer or solution, but unfortunately I've got nothing.

I'm not sure I agree that there's no one here that doesn't want you. Over the past few days I've gotten to know you better, and you seem nice and have a great sense of humor. I will say it's rather insulting, and condecending to have your friend tell you that you should be happy being single. Let me guess.. you told your friend to f**k off. That mouth of yours... :lol:

I wish that I had a quick fix or simple solution, but unfortunately I don't and I'm not going to give stupid advice. You do have friends here, stick around, and yes it's difficult being single but hang in there. Try and watch the use of the word f**k, because honestly I find it f**kin' offensive..

-cbox

by **yoa** » Mon Nov 07, 2011 12:05 am

I've read that the one who wants the relationship most, has the least power in that relationship. Ive wondered if this is why I loose the interest of girlfriends, as I so desperately need that affection. Having this in mind, i try to act not so interested, but ultimately fail. I cant seem to hold back, even when i try.

i don't think i know about the power business in relationship...but i'm still tipsy and my head hurts. so i'll read it again when i'm fully sober and we'll see if i can make a better word for you.
thank you lander

First, I wanna say I'm really f**kin' offended by your constant use of the word F**k... so f**kin' offended that I bolded all the f**ks that you used. What the f**k is up with that?

i'm terribly sorry cbox. i believe i was so mess up last night. i don't usually use that word often...not in my daily basis because i'll feel offended too

thank you for staying around n say sumthing despite of how you feel with my words

by **cboxpalace** » Mon Nov 07, 2011 12:21 am

yoa wrote:[
First, I wanna say I'm really f**kin' offended by your constant use of the word F**k... so f**kin' offended that I bolded all the f**ks that you used. What the f**k is up with that?

i'm terribly sorry cbox. i believe i was so mess up last night. i don't usually use that word often...not in my daily basis because i'll feel offended too

thank you for staying around n say sumthing despite of how you feel with my words

Yoa, I was joking with you... You don't have to apologize.....

I forget that English isn't your native language.. You're a GOOD person!!!

by **Helle** » Mon Nov 07, 2011 1:58 am

Yoa! I feel the same sometimes...

I feel like I'm not going to find anyone either... They all leave, they all want to leave... Even the more normal ones.. I don't understand either, what I do wrong

I have to say though, if I was a lesbian, I would totally go for you! You're so nice, caring and cute!

And I'm sure you're just being unconfident, I'm sure you're drop dead gorgeous in person..

But you just have to wait yoa... it sucks waiting, and trying with every guy. If they didn't leave, we wouldn't have a huge fear of abandonment or stormy relationships!

But I'm sure you will meet someone... It does take time. Not forever, but it takes time. A lot of women and men are married on here with kids, and it does make me jealous. Not because I want children yet, but because those that are married have that sense of security.

I guess what I'm trying to say is it will happen, you just have to keep going and meeting new people...branching out. Mutual friends of friends are a good place to start. I've met a few men that I've dated and been with from mutual friends.

In the mean time, keep drinking and go and dance

have fun, let go of things and take your mind off everything. Let loose!

by **Rednal** » Mon Nov 07, 2011 2:09 am

Chaudement wrote:Let loose!

Loose, footloose
Kick off your Sunday shoes
Please, Louise
Pull me offa my knees

lalalala la

by **yoa** » Mon Nov 07, 2011 7:13 am

i feel much better now...and off course a lot more sober :twisted:

Loose, footloose
Kick off your Sunday shoes
Please, Louise
Pull me offa my knees

lalalala la

jack get back
c'mon before we cracked :lol:

Yoa, I was joking with you... You don't have to apologize.....
I forget that English isn't your native language.. You're a GOOD person!!!

...now that i'm sober and i found your funny intention :lol:

I have to say though, if I was a lesbian, I would totally go for you! You're so nice, caring and cute! And I'm sure you're just being unconfident, I'm sure you're drop dead gorgeous in person..

funny...i even tried to be lesbian one time or two...but still didn't work either. perhaps it's more about identity issue for that...at least that way i'm sure that i'm not a lesbian :roll:

but i feel flattered that you feel that way about me

i hope you luck in your date

In the mean time, keep drinking and go and dance have fun, let go of things and take your mind off everything. Let loose!

that's what i call an idea :twisted:

Were your previous partners "warm" or "cold"? And from the ones that were, how did you recognize it? was it things they said or didn't say? Or did you recognize it straight away?
and can you think of more things? like interests/hobbies? did your previous partner have the same interests as you?
And from the bad experience with the guy that abused you, have you learned how to "recognize" such men by the things he did or said in the beginning? it will maybe prevent you from making that mistake again.
And how quickly do you trust someone, and start a relationship? Maybe you are too trusting sometimes as well?

hmmmm...tricky questions you posed above. all i can say is when a guy hurt me physically, then he's plain bad

and when he smile and hugs me or made me coffee when i need it, he's warm.
it sounds so black and white huh? i'll work it out harder...gimme time.

thank you for all of you respond and it means a lot for me b/c now i feel complete stupid to ever posted it...but hey i thought i have the right as a drunk women :lol:

and i'd like to dedicate the song bellow for me...and for you all :
"and love tastes good to me, today"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j0k0wRub4zc&feature=related

by **Rednal** » Mon Nov 07, 2011 7:53 am

LOL at that song, made me laugh.

AAAARRRGGGH!!! *triggering

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