Scared to see therapist and be "treated"

Um so the way this goes is as follows. I came out as transgender in more specifics I believe I am a male on the inside or in actaul reality. I like to think the I have an XY chromosome set up and then a random leg spontanously grem on my Y chromosome without first consulting me. So yeah big whoopdey do, I consider myself at current to be a female-bodied man. Now here I am big me for once and dressing the way I feel is right for me, cutting my hair according to what I feel is right for me, and getting myself called by a name I think is right for me. (IE: I started wearing men's clothes full time and stopped wearing the skirt full time like my religious cultrue was dictating, I got a boy's hair cut, and I start going by the male version of my name.) Then I come out to my mother on Oct. 11th of this year. She knew I was questioning my gender She knew I was dysphoric she knew I was wearing pants sometimes outside of the house in secret and sometimes in the house in secret Yet, coming out as trans was some how a big step TO HER when I did it. It was like a shock on her system HUH? Now, she is trying to convince me that I jumped to conclusions and that what I felt was a gender identity disorder and the way I think and this whole concept of me being transgender was a big step and possibley an inaccurate one. (For once in my life I feel like I'm being me and now she is telling me well... keep an open mind you may just be crazy.) She wants me to keep an open mind that I have counted my chickens before they have hatched, and that in all actauality it is possible that I have bordline personality disorder and this is leading me somehow to question my identity or that I might have schizoid personality disorder and that my thought patterns are some how deluisions or abnormal symptoms of one of these two disorders I have never been diagnosed with. She tells me to be prepared that a therapist might tell me this and that I should keep an open mind. Now internally I am split on this matter: part of me wants to write what she's saying off as her form of denile and her form of going through the "it must be insanity" phase. Yet, there is this part of me now that is scared that she maybe right. What if... what if... what if they try to convince me I am a girl and try to say I'm just having some other mental issue? Would they then isist on treating me? Would they try to kill the part of me that makes me happy? The part of me that loves the world? The part of me that has hopes and aspirations? The part of me that wants to live and break free? The part of me I feel I am and aspire to be completely not just in spirit but in body to? Would they try to seperate me from my inner child the way I had seperated myself form myself so I could go on in denile living my life hopeless and helpless, suicidal, desperate, anxious, insecure, and living life as a shell? Would they want to make me go back to living as the miserable person I was just so I could be a girl like my body looks? Will they do this to me? I just want to be me. Or is that the problem I am crazy with borderline personality or crazy with schizoid personality disorder and they are causing me to think I am a boy inside? IS that even possible can these illnesses cause "cross thought patterns?" (I am posting this on all three forums to see what people think and to see if anyone has been here.)

What kind of treatment you are given initially really depends on the outcome of your first few visits, so you wont know what it will be like unless you go. I understand your anxiety as it is a pretty difficult thing to do, but if you have decided that you want to get better (as in rest assured that you are not crazy) then you have to make the first step. I cannot offer any advice on alternatives because I don't know of any, and I have had a pretty disastrous run with therapists but you just have to try. After all they are being paid to be as understanding as possible

edit] I forgot to add, that they can also help you through the process of adjusting your life and the people in it to your change, and help you find some clarity.