Sever BPD.

Hi, I'm L. I'm 24 years old, been diagnosed 4 years ago. My life was chaotic before, but now it's a living hell. I can't hold down a job. I've got no ambitions. My family loathes me because of my hectic behavior. I cut, binge, abuse alchohol and benzodizapines. I'm constantly drained. Tried so many meds, none have of them helped. Waiting for an approval for DBT sessions, it's gonna take more than two months.

I'm barely functioning. suicidal a lot. don't wanna do anything or be anything. If I could, I would sleep forever. The most diffucult part for me is my family. They are cold and ###$ up and unsupportive. Just like me.

I just might lose the place I live here now. I've been ED free for a year and a half and lately I've started to binge at night. I'm terrified. Scared I'll never improve. I wish I knew where to turn. But I'm not sure there's hope for me.

Hi L, welcome to the nut house.

You say that your life was chaotic before, but a living hell now. What changed? Did something happen to cause the increase in behaviour? Remember, a BPD diagnosis is only saying what's already there; they didn't add anything new to the mix. I don't have any first-hand experience with bennies, so I can't really say much about them, but I'll tell you right now; alcohol, as much as it helps numb you temporarily, is a huge depressant. I hate to say it, but cutting down on the alcohol could help.

I hope you get in that DBT session. I'm not in one yet (I see my doc about it this Wednesday), but everyone around here who has been in them say that they do help.

Remember that we're always here for you.

I've had so many diagnoses as a teenager- Anorexia nervosa, OCD, depression, but I was still a person. I was alive, even when times were tough. Now I've got no ambitions. Total apathy.

I live outside of the USA, and it's very difficult to get into a DBT program. There are very few of them. Hope I'll get lucky. The same goes to you. Thanks.