Forgive me if i wasted your time

As the thread title implies, forgive me if you read this and feel you wasted your time.
With that being said my intentions of this post are for the reason of self improvement. A step in a process I'm embarking and have no other idea on where to start.

I am not currently diagnosed with any mental disorder by a professional. Although I may have any number of mental illnesses, I chose to post under the Borderline Personality Disorder forum as its highly probable that I have BPD. I have never been evaluated by a professional to have a proper diagnosis given. A multitude of reasons contribute to my hesitation of seeking professional help. I'm not looking for an evaluation from members of this forum, more of looking for support to help quell some of my hesitation about getting one. As well as after i begin the process of getting one and upon its completion a support group to help me along the way.

I guess ill start with my most overwhelming hesitation, not being open with the professional who is trying to diagnose me. This is very much an unrealistic hesitation based on the fact that they would be professionals and familiar with people who are hesitant about revealing emotions and letting people in. If anyone felt this way before seeing a professional for the first time could share their experience and if they felt it was easier than they expected or more difficult to open up and why.

Another reason I hesitate, is I often feel I don't deserve the help. This is most likely do to part of my mental problems of self hatred and a lack of self worth. I'm not really looking for input on this one i just don't open up well even with the anonymity of a forum, and wanted to keep writing while on here.

Upon conclusion of that last thought the only hesitation i have that could possibly be addressed by others is the first with sharing of their experience. All the others are interpersonal problems which i would need to handle personally. I thank anyone who responds in advance. Again if you read this far and feel it was a waste of your time i apologize.

P.S. To the moderator's if i posted this in an incorrect place I'm Sorry.

YOU ARE TOO CUTE!



I'm not sure how to reply. I'm sure others will be more helpful and less abrasive.

Someone stuck a gun to my head and forced me to read this post and I'm very angry at you about it. You should also apologize to the gunman.

This is the best place to start. Sometimes, it is the hardest part. It took me a year and some violent fits to finally accept that there was something wrong with me. That periods of clear 'sanity' weren't enough to discount everything else. I wasn't making this all up for attention, or anything like that. It was happening.

They will also be familiar with your hesitation. A good book to read is Get Me Out of Here: My Recovery from Borderline Personality Disorder. At the beginning it shows her first meeting with a therapist. That and Lost in the Mirror: An Inside Look at Borderline Personality Disorder. It helped to see the issues I was having through someone else, projected onto someone else. It made it easier to say: "Okay, I need a therapist."

Ugh wth is that avatar Twisted? Some Star Trek alien?


@Frosted eyes - welcome. Stop being so apologetic. Your time is just as precious as ours - you took the time to post, so we'll answer you best we can, although I'm not sure what is it exactly you need from us? Post some more, tell us about you

Welcome to the nuthouse, Frosted!

As for getting diagnosed, don't worry too much about it. From my own experience and what I've heard from others, the one who diagnoses you is rarely, if ever, the one who treats you. You'll talk with the doc, maybe fill in a questionnaire, and then read the report. That's it. Psychiatrists seem to be the diagnosers, but never do treating themselves - too busy, I guess. So take comfort in the fact that you won't have to deal with them more than once.

Treatment, of course, is another matter. I need to get off my a** and set up a therapy appointment; I'm still hesitating on that one.

Hi Frosted,

I've had trouble disclosing to professionals too - tbh, i just don't trust them, and worry a dx of anything might somehow cause me problems, (or take away control over my own treatment ? - but they tell me the MH services have changed that way and are not like that any more.) i worry that i'll be labelled while they treat me badly as they have done in the past, or refuse to treat me at all, or just be unhelpful.

So i can understand having trouble approaching them. I'm on a waiting list atm, and will let everyone know how it goes when i finally get somewhere, if it helps to know how they are. So far they have been mostly helpful, and have been understanding about anything i have disclosed and have also respected confidentiality, and my privacy. its obviously not perfect, but nothing too bad so far.

and of course they are used to treating people who have trouble disclosing their emotions.

Why do you feel like you don't deserve help? You deserve help just as much as anyone does... or do we all have to squeeze you until you believe you are worth it ? lol


Welcome to the forum.

Ugh wth is that avatar Twisted? Some Star Trek alien?

Twistedmister wrote:

Ugh wth is that avatar Twisted? Some Star Trek alien?

Oh sorry I've obviously upset a Trekkie...