Thanks guys.

I know I love my attention. I know I'm selfish and have all sorts of issues, minor and major. I just want to thank everyone that has been helping my sorry ass out for the past couple weeks or so.

Nate86 wrote:I know I love my attention. I know I'm selfish and have all sorts of issues, minor and major. I just want to thank everyone that has been helping my sorry ass out for the past couple weeks or so.

Hi,

I'm not trying to be critical or 'negative' here, I just thought I'd point out that peppering your statements with self-abasing remarks is a terrible mistake people with depression often make. It's especially bad when men do it, as it will make the more jerky men see you as weak and subsequently f--- with you, and it will turn women off. Like, seriously turn them off. As in, "This guy is at best friend material, if that." Doing it once can turn many women off forever; you'll be immediately nixed as a possible love interest. You'll be written off, just like that.

What I'm saying is: Until you make it, fake it. I say that as you can't transform, or gain the confidence to not even think those things overnight; especially since confidence comes from the experience of knowing what you're made of. So, until you get there, you may consider faking it? Simply as you're thinking it doesn't mean it has to come out of your mouth.

You know the term for it is 'self-talk', right? You're caught up negative self-talk, and you are telling yourself those things. You can use self-talk to tell yourself anything you want, positive or negative, but depression is putting a negative bent on your self-talk.

What you're actually doing is projecting your anxieties of how you feel people are or may be viewing and perceiving you, or how your depressed mind is viewing yourself --or both-- onto other people and assuming that's what they think of you. No, that's what you think of you. Perhaps you also say it to say it before other people say it to you, as you're certain they will? To avoid the sting/pain of hearing it from their mouths?

I can guarantee you that grand overwhelming majority of people --likely none at all-- were not thinking "Wow, this guy is a real attention whore", or "This is a selfish ahole", or "Wow, what a sorry ass." It never even entered anyone's mind, of that I'm certain. One thing I am certain of though is a lot of people were thinking "Why the fark is he saying that?" In my case, I cringed and face-palmed.

Not telling how to speak or act, I'm only saying that all you had to say which will seriously help you in the long run, was:

"I just want to thank everyone that has been helping me out for the past couple weeks or so."

A bit better, perhaps? And better for you? I just hate to think that you're going around in real-life saying things like that? If so, you should stop. Like, post-haste.

Is it me, or are most women weird? I think of men as actually being people...

O.o. Fine. I wasn't tryin' to really bring myself down or anything. I guess I didn't have time to take a second look at that or anything. I just said that because of the way I've treated some people here. Being so defensive and self-absorbed at times. I'm rather sarcastic and it doesn't transfer over very well in texts/posts. Basically, what I was trying to say was more like, Thanks for putting up with some of my poor behavior at times. Thanks for breaking through some barriers that really let me see myself in a different way. Also, being critical of things that ARE true let's me focus on them. I AM selfish and do have all sorts of issues I'm attempting to work out. The latter part was more of sarcasm. I wanted to over-explain it, but I had to leave. Just wanted to get it out there I guess.

You were right though. It was the wrong way to post it. I really am thankful and I feel a whole lot better IRL. Let's just say I'm doing a lot better than I ever have been before. Better? xD

Much better

Yes, how you word things can make or break anything; I learnt that the hard way. I think most people do -- just, some learn it harder than others. The school of hard-knocks is the only school most of us will ever know, I'm afraid. I'm not even sure of how I feel about that anymore as it's what I've come accustomed to; I can't remember any other school. In some twisted way I look forward to being knocked down as I know I'll get up stronger and wiser for it.

-- Sun Sep 25, 2011 5:02 am --

katana wrote:Is it me, or are most women weird? I think of men as actually being people...

Well I think we're mainly referring to more shallow people here, of which there exists on both sides in equal measure. Our life struggles give us depth and force us to see things others can ignore, or not even be aware of in the first place. Further, we can't afford to be shallow. At least, not for very long.

There's a line from a Rage Against The Machine song which I love, always remember, and often reference: "If ignorance is bliss then wipe the smile off my face."

If suffering is what it takes to not be a shallow ignoramus, then so be it.