Friends... His & Mine

So...
Red, my bf, thinks that we need to see our friends more and each other less... which is easy for him to say, since he still has friends... I get the concept... but I don't like it.
I mean, it's bad enough he has friends he won't let me meet (usually his high school girls) and a whole world of socializing I don't know about... and I'm paranoid to crap about that, but if I mention suspicion we have to turn it into a joke...

I don't really have friends... I have the internet...
I have my live in friend, currently obsessed with her boyfriend that just got here... so that's a useless thing unless I want to play 3rd wheel... and I don't.
I have my gay friend, who's really uptight and... well, I saw him last night and we really don't have anything in common anymore.
SB - Too irritating for me to deal with (which sounds mean, but I really just can't deal with her drama).
JL - Too busy with college plans (I'm just glad he's not leaving state, not that I've seen him more than once in the past year).
TC - Has kids and a family life (which never stopped us before but she's turned into super mom).
MR - Turned into a controlling jerk (for real, I'm going to kill him in his sleep so his wife can be a person again).

And... that's the end of MY friends...

My friend, singular, that I got through Red is a stoner... and I like her and all, but I'm done with weed, so I'm not sure what I'd do with her...

I'm thinking about lying to him and just going to Village Inn and playing on my computer, but telling him I'm going out with someone... It's not like I've ever had an abundance of girl-friends.
I'm not good at making friends, and I'm worse at keeping them, unless they're male.

Problem with my guy friends? I have a tendency to sleep with them... which is why I don't see them anymore.
I already have two trying to get me to hang out with them, and I know they want to talk me out of my relationship with Red... they're good guys, but I'm trying to make this work...
Pirate thinks a sorrid affair between us would help me keep Red in perspective, so maybe I can see his flaws and leave him.
Ink just... really wishes that I had never met Red, because he was waiting for me to accept his offer of a relationship...

I just... He thinks that I have friends I'm ignoring...
Last night I called everyone I could think of to hang out...
Only one person answered... my gay friend I seem to have grown apart from...
So...

What should I do?

Wow, I started to reply to this and caught myself going off on some rant about my ex. Forgive my bitterness. All I can say is, at least you care enough to ask. If all else fails, he can hang out with his friends while you find something self-constructive to do... or use that time to meet some new friends? I don't really understand why there are people he won't let you meet, that seems kind of weird. Time apart now and then is healthy though so I can agree to that. Maybe try to connect more with the people you've grown apart from. At least it's a start. It sounds like he's going to hang out with his friends regardless.

Mateo wrote:Wow, I started to reply to this and caught myself going off on some rant about my ex. Forgive my bitterness. All I can say is, at least you care enough to ask. If all else fails, he can hang out with his friends while you find something self-constructive to do... or use that time to meet some new friends? I don't really understand why there are people he won't let you meet, that seems kind of weird. Time apart now and then is healthy though so I can agree to that. Maybe try to connect more with the people you've grown apart from. At least it's a start. It sounds like he's going to hang out with his friends regardless.

I'm with Mateo on this one.

He can't quite see his friends unless I take him to them.
I love being the one with a car... hahahaha...
I'm so just anti-social.... it's retarded. Lol

I feel better today, because I made a friend.
She's coming over Tuesday to play video games and drink beer with my roomie and me.
Yay girls day.
She's like... what would happen if my roomie and me had an illegitimate child.

Ah, car control. I too enjoy that feeling and anti-social happens. Hell, I have friends that I really like and there are still times when I don't want to see any of them. A new friend that likes drinking beer and playing video games? That sounds like the best kind of new friend.

ug yes, I hate it when you would like to be serious but you end up having to make it into a joke.
I don't personally get the "my" friends thing, reminds me of when I was little and my big sis wouldn't let me talk to her friends because she was afraid they would like me, and she wanted them all to herself.
but I guess people do like space, they don't want you to be involved in every aspect of their life. not sure why they can't have some personal activity for that, instead of hiding their friends, but w/e
and I wouldn't lie to him about seeing people when your not
and my last boyfriend, well, his friends became my friends, and before I didn't really have any friends, so after we broke up it was a little awkward and I got paranoid and couldn't tell if I was being intrusive, and should stay away from them because I was no longer dating their friend. so.... at least you wont have that problem.
and I'm glad you have that one chick to hang out with, hopefully that will work. but don't be disappointed if it doesn't. It's not so bad not having "friends." and I know eventually you'll find someone.
as for the pot head, that's just what happens. like when I stopped drinking I lost my drinking buddies.
-good luck with everything
you didn't talk much about your relationship with the red guy, but I was thinking, maybe you should think about that. You said you want to make it work, but why? because he's really good for you, or because you just don't want to break up. I remember one relationship I tried so hard to make it work, not because I liked him, but because I had just realized that I break up with everyone I date for usually no reason at all. and actually, he was the only guy I didn't regret breaking up with. so yeah. just make sure your doing what makes you happy

I talk about my relationship with Red a lot on here, actually.
He's a good guy, but inherrantly a jerk...
Half of the time I want to clock him in the face, the other half I love him so completely that I can't imagine a life without him.
We just do well for each other.
It sounds a little assinine... I'm aware.

If I can just get him to cut down on the pot, I'll be happy enough.
He's stressed out... and I'm giving until the end of July to get fixed.
I know that he put up with my crippling depression, so I'll put up with this...
For a reasonable amount of time, anyway.

SmileXx wrote:I know that he put up with my crippling depression, so I'll put up with this...
For a reasonable amount of time, anyway.

That's the important part to keep in mind.

I know.
I'm just recently returning to... ME.
I've been someone else for months, and I finally feel better, and like myself.
So maybe it's just the rapid adjustment that happened there.
I've been a lot to deal with and that contributes to his current state.

All I ask is that he vacuums and cuts down on the weed a bit.
I think two months is enough time to make that happen...

I'm hoping, anyway...
I really love Red, but since I'm back to ME, I know that if there isn't a marked improvement I'm going to do something awful to him.
I love being me... but I'm not really sure I should date people when I'm actually me.
I'm a viscious b!tch.

To be honest I'd go crazy if I was with your boyfriend. x_x Sounds like he needs to get off his ass and actually do stuff.