Does it sound like I have BPD?

- I am extremely hurt when I feel rejected or unwanted. After breakups I tend to become despondent and to destroy everything that I own that reminds me of that person.
- I am constantly paranoid that people will reject me or don't really want to know me
- Every friendship/relationship I have is very, VERY intense and turbulent, mostly as a result of me making insensitive comments, going nuts from feeling betrayed or unwanted, and feeling very jealous/paranoid.
- I discard people practically overnight and completely cut them off altogether when they hurt me
- I abuse alcohol (1 bottle of vodka/whiskey a day) and am anorexic
- I become obsessed with my romantic interests. I'm not a stalker by any stretch, but I think about them constantly and tend towards idealistic views of the girls I like. However, I randomly completely get over them almost instantaneously, for no reason.
- I think about suicide literally all the time. I constantly threaten people with suicide, tell them that they will be to blame if I kill myself etc.
- I am prone to terrible mood swings. Going from elated to extremely angry or depressed in the bat of an eyelid.
- Sometimes I break down and cry for no reason or I go into fits of rage where I smash my belongings. Once I demolished everything I owned with a hammer.
- Some days my confidence is so high that I officially have swagger. On others my confidence is so low that I shake visibly in social situations.
- People often accuse me of being a user, taking advantage of them, or taking them for granted, though I have not consciously done any of these things.

My life is hell right now and I want to know why. I'm an 18 year old guy btw.

Hi there.

You have taken a good look at your behaviors, that is a start.
You might have suffered some kind of trauma in your life?

Look at your list..... if you have any kind of mental,emotional issues alcohol is not the medicine for you.
It makes a person very unstable. The goal is to be mindful of yourself and stay as stable as you can.

If you need help doing this, talk with a psych.

Blessings to you,
red

Trauma... yeah, I was pretty badly abused by my brothers emotionally and physically as a kid. My mum is bipolar and my dad was an abusive alcoholic. Neither of them ever showed me any affection. Lots of other stuff has happened but I try not to think about it.

I am sorry, I too was badly abused. You have your answer, and you have the power to change it.

I know you don't want to think about it, but if you work through it and know why then it is easier to tame.
You seem to be quite intelligent, and that helps you be selfaware and how you feel and why.