unconditional love

I posted a similar topic in the narcissistic forum, but I want imput here. I have been diagnosed borderline for several years now. I was pregnant a couple years back by someone I did not want to have a child with so I went through an abortion. Now I want to have a child again. I need someone to love me regardless of being borderline. I feel ike when I date or have sex with a man all they think about is me being borderline (or narcissistic). I called an old bf who is 15 yrs older than me and he said he would come tomorrow and I told him I needed to talk to him. I don't want to tell him that I want a child. Then he might not want to have sex with me. I figure I'll get him in bed and see what happends from there.

I want a child so bad. Plus this guy is good looking... in fact he is a practicing therapist in a town about an hr from where I live. I don't think I'm in "love" with him or at least now yet. But I know I want his and miy genes to be passed on to this child.

This guy knows I am borderline, but instead of treating me badly for it he helped me. I don't even know why we broke up. This happened back in January. I just want everything to work out.

*Edited*

44 i go through those wanting a child so bad spells as well. I want a child with a man that isnt even talking to me now.
I have dreamt many plans of tricking him and just having a baby. Ultimately its not the best thing for the kid or you. I have used all my will power at some points. Then like a week later I am thinking OMG am I nuts. Now I am back to wanting a kid.
The child need will go away in a week or so.

Get this guy to take you on a date.