Psychiatrist is suspicious

I have been on most of the big name medications for Depression, Anxiety, and ADHD since high school, and have gone to multiple psychiatrists and psychologists over the years. Now I am in my mid 20's and feel that I have some self-awareness of my well-being and where I struggle after digging around so much.

After a huge life altering incident, including legal issues and a toxic romantic relationship, I had to change my whole life around. I have been seeing my "new" Pdoc for more than a year now, and feel that little progress is being made. She has all my previous medical records, knows everything about me and my life, and it's all out on the table, so I'm frustrated that things are like this.

Immediately when I began to see her, she took me off of my anti-anxiety and ADHD medications, but kept my on my anti-depressant. I was fine with this and wanted to make it work. However, I have recently found out that she took me off of these because she believes (she was the only doctor to diagnosis me as BPD, and only after a really awful event and time in my life) I have a substance use problem. I initially talked about how my Klonopin and Vyvanse helped me so much (less frustration, began to make friends again, stopped constantly switching jobs, homes and schools), and now looking back, I think that she thought I was trying to convince her to give me more medication. I had a lot of friends who did this, so I understand where her suspicions came from.

In addition to my psychiatrist, I see a psychologist who agrees with me that my BPD diagnosis was very circumstantial and that the it's a good idea to make sure I stay out of extremely stressful and dangerous situations - I know many users here will say that BPD exists on a spectrum and I agree, I just feel that my previous Anxiety and ADHD diagnoses have been ignored and I'm grasping onto thin air right now. I am unable to hold a job, I have not gotten things done for months, and I am so overwhelmed that any anger or impulsivity is considered to my Pdoc to be a symptom of BPD. I'm sure many of our cognitive skills we work on help for any diagnosis - but in terms of medication, I feel that my life could go back to how it was when I functioned so much better.

I have no idea what to do. Oh, and I'm not trying to say I know more than Pdocs. But a year has passed and I've had a good amount of time to think about this.

I have bipolar disorder and several anxiety disorders. I dread the day when my pdoc quits practicing. I agree, you absolutely deserve to receive treatment for anxiety and ADHD.

My pdoc has prescribed me to take 1 mg of Klonopin every six hours. I never exceed the dosage and sometimes I forget a dose...but I'm scared if I get pulled off benzos. I have panic attacks and struggle with agoraphobia. Klonopin really helps so much. I've heard it is so hard to discontinue benzos. He has prescribed Klonopin to me for ten years now.

I hope you can get your pdoc to be more receptive to your needs. I've found explaining symptoms at appointments helpful, instead of a medication. But that's wrong for her to assume you're a drug-seeker! You have your medical history documented and you know what works for you.

Wait, your pdoc is the only one who has diagnosed you of having BPD? Uh, you really should see a psychologist for that. Most psychiatrists are just walking pill dispensaries. I would definitely get a second opinion.

I have ADHD and BPD and no one has ever tried to justify taking away my meds. That's completely inappropriate. You need to see a new pdoc regardless.

Now, if you actually have BPD, I don't think you should be on a benzo. I actually don't think anyone should be on a benzo, but especially not PwBPD. I believe you're better off learning coping skills and trying to figure out what triggers your anxiety than popping a pill and that ish is crazy addictive. ADHD meds are a completely different story in my opinion, especially vyvanse since it's long acting and hard to abuse, but some my disagree with me on that one.

Regardless, dump the pdoc, see a psychologist as a second opinion, and go from there.

Also, I'm sorry to hear about your toxic relationship issues and legal trouble. I don't know your history but I can probably relate. I hope you can find the right meds and therapy to get you back on track!

Foucault_me_slowly wrote:Wait, your pdoc is the only one who has diagnosed you of having BPD? Uh, you really should see a psychologist for that. Most psychiatrists are just walking pill dispensaries. I would definitely get a second opinion.

I have ADHD and BPD and no one has ever tried to justify taking away my meds. That's completely inappropriate. You need to see a new pdoc regardless.

Now, if you actually have BPD, I don't think you should be on a benzo. I actually don't think anyone should be on a benzo, but especially not PwBPD. I believe you're better off learning coping skills and trying to figure out what triggers your anxiety than popping a pill and that ish is crazy addictive. ADHD meds are a completely different story in my opinion, especially vyvanse since it's long acting and hard to abuse, but some my disagree with me on that one.

Regardless, dump the pdoc, see a psychologist as a second opinion, and go from there.

Also, I'm sorry to hear about your toxic relationship issues and legal trouble. I don't know your history but I can probably relate. I hope you can find the right meds and therapy to get you back on track!

Yes, at the moment the only one who has diagnosed me. I have been to a mix of psychiatrists and psychologists before, and they were aware that in very extreme situations I show signs of BPD related behavior, but on a day to day basis I am within the norm of distress due to anxiety, ADHD.

I'll definitely think about not taking a benzo. In the past, I will say that I've had some bad experiences with them in terms of being very sad and waking up very sad the next day. I have a theory that because I'm not dealing with my attention/concentration issues, that no wonder I'm not even able to employ or stick with ANY kind of coping skills.

Yep, I've scheduled an appointment with a different one! I have this fear that my current pdoc will get very angry with me if they find out I have gone to get a second opinion.

And thank you for your concern, I stopped taking my ADHD meds and feel that is a big reason I got into trouble (impulsivity and just seriously not able to sort anything out in my head...). Definitely want to be on track and be productive again, my goals are very different from what my pdoc thinks they are!

-- Tue May 23, 2017 10:43 am --

eterea107 wrote:I have bipolar disorder and several anxiety disorders. I dread the day when my pdoc quits practicing. I agree, you absolutely deserve to receive treatment for anxiety and ADHD.

My pdoc has prescribed me to take 1 mg of Klonopin every six hours. I never exceed the dosage and sometimes I forget a dose...but I'm scared if I get pulled off benzos. I have panic attacks and struggle with agoraphobia. Klonopin really helps so much. I've heard it is so hard to discontinue benzos. He has prescribed Klonopin to me for ten years now.

I hope you can get your pdoc to be more receptive to your needs. I've found explaining symptoms at appointments helpful, instead of a medication. But that's wrong for her to assume you're a drug-seeker! You have your medical history documented and you know what works for you.

I'm glad Klonopin has helped you so much! and I'm glad your doc is a good fit for you.

In the past, I have sometimes forgotten to take my medication and some days I have accidentally taken too much. Nothing intentional at all, but I believe this could have been a red flag for my pdoc. I believe that she is focused on the big picture, aka BPD diagnosis, and when I explain things like my daily frustration from not being able to stick with anything and feeling like I'm getting behind day by day (which, I am!), she pushes it aside and wants to deal with what she believes I don't want to talk about. For example, my childhood, which she thinks what severely damaging...even though I told her my childhood was wonderful and if anything I was spoiled!

Thanks for your kind words, I'm hoping this will get sorted out soon.