Loosing motivation... always.

I am bored. I started an education. I hate it. It is not what i wanted to do. But i had to start one.

I know that if i had motivation to do anything, nothing would be a problem. But i don't want to. I don't want to do it. I hate it. It bores me. I want to abort this education. I still try to learn for tests and such. It is hard. I make myself do it. It doesn't stay in my brain.

This happens all the time. I start something, idealize it, then i devalue it. I want to know how to stay motivated longer than half a year for something. I want to. But i hate doing that thing which i once liked and the more i make myself do it, the more i hate it.

Do you have any recipe against that.

I don't know that I have any great advice for you but I thought I should let you know you're far from alone in this. I get this feeling ALL the time. How do you think I got the name Casper? When I don't like something anymore, I vanish like a freakin' ghost. Parties, hobbies, whatever. I don't like it anymore? Adios, muchachos. No question, no hesitation, just a cloud where I was standing three seconds ago.

DBT is helping me with that to some extent. It's given me exercises to help me pause and examine pros and cons and things like that which sometimes cause me to stay with something, even if only for a little while longer. TBH, I'm actually quite impressed with myself as to how long I've stuck with DBT - I thought that I'd have bolted from this a long time ago! I think the fact that it is showing consistent progress may help too.

That's something to look at. Is what you're doing showing any progress? If not, leaving may not be a bad idea after all. Be honest about it; don't just examine what's happened in the last week. If it is showing progress and you're feeling like you're getting something from it, then give it another shot. If not, you probably should re-examine why you're doing it and if it's still worth doing.

I second that. DBT helps loads along with medication. If I'm super sluggish I'll drink some coffee and induce some mania. Helps makes you a super human.