BPD at work

Hello,

so... I have a bpd co worker and she was in therapy back then told me one of my colleagues. She paints me black from time to time and tells lies and bad things to my boss. For example:

I am very strong and self confident when it comes to managing customers and she tells others that I am scaring them off which in reality diddnt happen but she makes it look like it does. What can I do about this? I feel like she feels threatened by my dominance and appearence/self esteem because she is low on it sometimes. She has fears but is it my job to remove those fears? How can I handle her avoiding working as a team with me even when I did tons of good things to make it work.

I have recently started this job and she works over 20 years in that company backstabbing people constantly. So I can't really raise my voice cause the decision goes into her favour I guess.

any advice?

ps: I really like that woman and have zero issues with her personally its just that her actions block me from making a good impression at my job... and I want to keep the job.

She may well be feeling threatened by you being younger and more dynamic than her. I think the best thing to do is keep doing the job you do. Try to excel in all areas, regardless of what she is doing or thinking. Follow procedures and acknowledge any mistakes you make. Don't let her see she is getting to you. Are you in a union at all? Rise above her behaviour and attitude. Just be the bigger person all the way. Perhaps keep a journal of things, dates and times of when things are bad, so you can evidence it.

Talk to a superior if you need to

Good luck

if she has been backstabbing everyone, so maybe everyone knows what her credibility is. so you needn't worry.

ignore her actions and do your work. are there other people at the office you can hang out with?

smurf wrote:Perhaps keep a journal of things, dates and times of when things are bad, so you can evidence it.

Talk to a superior if you need to

Good luck

or maybe ask her to communicate via email so you have proof.

Hey,

I was sent to the second devision now... im painted black in the eyes of my boss. The woman and my boss are close like friends. And well I do my best to reach highest goals as it should be. In Emails she responds very diplomatic.

Others that were put down, didnt have to worry about their job because they are far too long in this business, I am new and leagues better than many of them I feel and I really don't want to feel arrogant or selfish it is that I am doing like 120% of what I should. My new approach is to lay back and chill but it is not a final solution.

I had different fields of work before and in most people told me I am too overqualified. Must be that I am a super narcissist, I dont have any explanation else. Everything I do I do with alot of passion behind it and I try to improve as much as I can, can be a sign of perfectionism or simply ambition.

Well seeing as the BPD co-worker has been there for 20 years and has has treatment for it - maybe she is right that you are scaring customers away. She cannot make it look like it if the customers are still there and are happy with your work.

Saying that she feels put off by your dominance and self esteem sounds more like you are full of yourself.

Hey,

Of course I am full of myself it is what I wrote haven't I? But it doesnt mean people won't like that. It is about how I can manage to do this and customers love that about me, I am very direct and get to the point is their feedback. But she has a problem with me. I say what I think, what I feel and am not afraid to speak my mind. Is it nowadays bad to have an opinion and stand behind it?

Hello,

topic can be closed, my highest ranked boss overruled all and put me in first devision again and I have my own responsbilities now concerning my customers.

Thank you for the help