Why can't I keep eye contact?

I can't look people in the eyes, it just freaks me out so I look down or to the side.

Does anyone else have trouble with keeping eye contact?

It doesn't really freak me out. It's just uncomfortable for me to look someone in the eyes for longer than a few seconds. I think that however is pretty normal.

I don't really have a problem keeping eye contact. Or keeping really uncomfortable, prolongued, uncomfortable (for the other person) eye contact

I think that considering making eye contact is something that many people have to be reminded to do when, say, interviewing for a job or speaking before an audience, it's safe to say many/most people have a hard time maintaining eye contact.

hmm... that's sexy

Angelina88 wrote:I can't look people in the eyes, it just freaks me out so I look down or to the side.

Does anyone else have trouble with keeping eye contact?

I'm glad there's someone else besides me. Yes, I have problems with eye contact. It freaks me out too. I can only make eye contact with certain people like my family and my therapist and even then a couple of seconds max is all I can handle. I thought it might help to know that someone feels similar to you, but that's all I can offer since I also don't know why I can't hold eye contact. It's almost like a phobia for me. And if someone is trying to force me to hold eye contact, sometimes I lose control and hit them and/or start crying. Sorry I don't know why...

kavajava wrote: And if someone is trying to force me to hold eye contact, sometimes I lose control and hit them and/or start crying. Sorry I don't know why...

That's even sexier

I was diagnosed with aspergers as an adult three years ago. I would once maintain eye contact the entire time I would speak with somebody. I have since learnt that this is rarely appropriate. Since I have been having trouble functioning, I find it difficult to maintain eye contact beyond the odd fleeting glance. I think there is a natural rhythm to these things which I have no idea of.

Angelina88 wrote:I can't look people in the eyes, it just freaks me out so I look down or to the side.

Does anyone else have trouble with keeping eye contact?

Do you think its a lack of confidence? Are you a very confident person?

I usually only feel comfortable making direct eye contact when I feel very confident or I want to either threaten/intimidate or seduce the person.

Eye contact is very intense and brings up a lot of emotions.

It could also have to do with the fact that borderlines experience intense emotions as it is. Eye contact just magnifies the emotions that are already there.

Angelina88 wrote:Why can't I keep eye contact?

Because you're insecure about something.

Does anyone else have trouble with keeping eye contact?

Yes, I have trouble with that too. I worry that I'll see a negative expression in response to me, or really any expression that doesn't validate me and makes me feel like I'm being judged poorly or not taken seriously. I'm mainly insecure about my pronunciation of words and my intelligence. I worry about saying stupid things and often the anxiety from worrying about it is what causes me to mispronounce and say stupid things.

MotherRussia wrote:

Angelina88 wrote:I can't look people in the eyes, it just freaks me out so I look down or to the side.

Does anyone else have trouble with keeping eye contact?

It could also have to do with the fact that borderlines experience intense emotions as it is. Eye contact just magnifies the emotions that are already there.

Yes, it certainly magnifies the emotions.