Quiet Borderline

I am desperately seeking out someone whom I can relate/people who can relate to me.

I've recently been diagnosed with an Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder, aka Borderline Personality Disorder.

I have used other online forums in the past but find it difficult to relate to the way others experience their way of relating to the world and the people around them. I am a 'Quiet Borderline' and my behaviours are completely turned inwards, opposed to lashing out at people around me, which seems to be what others (generally) experience. There is not alot of material regarding the 'Quiet Borderline' but it does exist.

I guess I am wondering if anyone here would consider themselves to be more in the Quiet Borderline side than 'The Classic Borderline'.

I feel very isolated and need to know that I am not the only one.

Any comments would be much appreciated.

Take care

I'm not sure if I'm a "quiet borderline" because I do act out sometimes, but most of the time I hold things inside. Like when I dated guys in the past, I was so afraid of them leaving me in the beginning of a relationship, and could get jealous and feel very needy, but I wouldn't really express this to them by becoming demanding like many pwBPD do. Also, if someone is mean to me, I can deflect it, but mostly I think it's because I'm bad, an idiot, a piece of crap, etc. so there is acting-in behavior too.

Not sure if you can relate to this or not.

My guess is that you just haven't been pushed past your limits while backed into a corner. I consider myself a "quiet" borderline 99% of the time. However I've dealt with some very antagonizing people before, too, and I can absolutely go psycho b*tch under the right circumstances. When I'm not reacting to anything or feeling cornered, though, I just internalize almost everything.

ghostly, I can relate 100%. Wondering if you're INFP?

NimplyDinply wrote:ghostly, I can relate 100%. Wondering if you're INFP?

I just took it and it said ISTP.

In previous times though I've gotten INFP and INTJ.

I think those tests capture current mentalities more than personalities.

I'd definitely say i'm a "quiet borderline"

Everything tends to go on in my head - if i'm feeling really depressed i may cry etc to someone if i'm close to them, but otherwise i keep emotional expressions to myself

I can relate. Although I have characteristics of both the quiet as the classic borderline, most of the time it all happens inside me.

My therapist says that I used to have the classic variant (in my teenage years) but that it developed trough time. My fear of abandonment got bigger and bigger, and my acting out behavior would push people away from me. So I started to play a role, and kept all the difficult stuff to myself.
But, like others mentioned, in very stressful situations I can still be an impossible person to deal with. But there aren't a lot of people who'll see that side of me.

I'm pretty sure I'm a "quiet borderline". I do act out, but very rarely and usually just with family when I'm feeling trapped or feeling particularly slighted. I'm usually in my head.

NimplyDinply wrote:Wondering if you're INFP?

I'm actually INFP o:

Jeniikyou wrote:I'm pretty sure I'm a "quiet borderline". I do act out, but very rarely and usually just with family when I'm feeling trapped or feeling particularly slighted. I'm usually in my head.

Same here! I mostly act out around certain family members, but very rarely anyone else, if at all. You have to push me pretty hard to get me to have a go at you. I don't relate to lashing out at a therapist or getting into fights at work whatsoever. I'm pretty high-functioning in society.

I'm actually INFP o:

Me too! I wonder if there is a connection between introversion and better adaptability in public?

NimplyDinply wrote:Same here! I mostly act out around certain family members, but very rarely anyone else, if at all. You have to push me pretty hard to get me to have a go at you. I don't relate to lashing out at a therapist or getting into fights at work whatsoever. I'm pretty high-functioning in society.

I fantasize about lashing out at certain people sometimes, but I never do. I can only really think of two times I've lashed out at someone outside my family. My friend said she was shocked, and a little scared of ever getting on my bad side. I've never lashed out at a therapist. I just do whatever people want, and hate them for it when I'm alone

NimplyDinply wrote:Me too! I wonder if there is a connection between introversion and better adaptability in public?

Maybe, but I don't think I'm very good in public. I'm too scared of everyone. Afraid they will hate me, or judge me, or hurt me.