let down, emptied out.

Do you ever feel most let down by the people closets to you? My SO says I'm let down by people more than I should be. Not in a "Im better than you way", but more in a "why is this absurdity in my life." My SO feels that I am in fact "right", or that my feelings are valid but that maybe I hold people to certain standards in which they won't meet. I have high standards for ethics, consideration, and most importantly rationality and enhancement of ones life through relationships. When I feel people are being flaky or argumentative in a non productive way, or they act ignorant...it has a depressive effect on me. It's definitely because I feel these things can easily be avoided. My SO thinks that maybe I am too invested in my friends at times, but I can tell she wishes she had close relationships with friends. When people let me down, it makes me depressed. I don't "split" in the same way as low functioning pwBPD, but I feel it negatively impacts my life to be "thrown off" by conflicts that I can't justify.

I'm pretty sensitive to how people treat me, especially people close to me like family members and close friends. I'm really sensitive to disrespect and being treated like I don't matter or like I'm less important. Maybe my expectations are too high too. I really don't know.

I've gotten to where I have to minimize contact with people if they tend to treat me that way, because there is no way I can change them. And I just end up hurt and angry about certain things they do.

I don't know if its us or them though.

I get teh same way kinda. I get real sad and angry when someone lets me down because I would go to so many lengths to make sure somethings got done for someone right but no one else ever seasm to have my level of dedication. I always feel sad and angry to the point if someone is late and call I will get angry and start a private tantrum because I am being disrespected by not getting a phone call when its been 2 hours later than it should. But phone was dead.