Naughty Interweb

There are a veritable plethora of online articles warning 'nons' (more hilarious each time I write it) not to date Borderlines.

Am I the only one for whom such propaganda yields an obsession to date as many 'unsuspecting victims' as I can?

This is a thread written with tongue firmly in cheek, but still... Insulting no?

Oh my god yes! I've literally just read the most offensive article ever (here: http://www.returnofkings.com/9482/dont- ... y-disorder ). And what is even worse is the comments section underneath. Honestly its so cruel, accusing us of being serial cheaters, vandals, life destroyers etc. Frankly these people deserve any abuse they might have got and well done to all these borderlines for making them feel as though their lives have been "ruined", they most likely deserved it!

Although, on a serious note, I do actually feel sorry for the people I date. I often wonder if actually I'm being irresponsible and unfair getting involved with anyone new and actually I should really just do them a massive favour and stay away. Like how fair is it to start something with someone when you know you'll inevitably begin splitting, being jealous, massively angry over small things etc.? Once they've had chance to care about you, then to do that to them and make them miserable, when if I'd just had a bit more self-control and stayed away they'd probably be in a happy relationship with someone else by then who would't do any of that to them.

This might redirect the emphasis of this post back to me (what an absolute shocker!) but I do question what's so utterly repugnant about being borderline. I don't beat folk up (not for 10 years anyway). TW?... I don't force myself upon women. All I ask for is a little latitude over my insecurities. I do not believe I deserve to be vilified. And I'll continue to date, thank you very much Google!

But we are supposedly needy and manipulative, start lots of arguments, over react. Why would a person choose to date one of us over a non who wouldn't act like that?
But I do agree that we totally don't deserve to be blamed for it, like we're doing it intentionally because we're selfish and like to hurt people.

The problem as with most things in life is ignorance.

These articles and responses have probably been written by someone that has been hurt by a pwBPD. In all honesty I could have written one as I felt I had been the victim of a con. Rather than stopping in the victim stage I read ad I learnt and got past it.

The reason a lot of pwBPD are seen as manipulators is because the beginning (idolisation phase) is so good. When the "non" is split then it feels like our world has ended. We go from gods to monsters and we cannot work out what we did wrong.

We all want to find the one and to do that we take a leap of faith. We open ourselves up and this leaves us vulnerable. Ive read a number of posts here that say that all my relationships go the same way. How many of us are completely honest in the beginning of the relationship? probably no one on the planet. That being the case how many mention they have BPD during the honeymoon phase or do they hope that this time it will be different?

The problem with these articles is that it generalises a disorder and highlights one particular aspect. This isn't helpful. Some aspects of personality disorders are completely overlooked. The fact that John Lennon was more than likely BPD and one of the greatest song writers of all time. Would he have been as talented without his disorder? Albert Einstein is said to have been Bi polar. David James the goalkeeper scores highly for ASPD. Steve McQueen is also thought to have been BPD and one of the greatest actors of his time.

Rather than concentrate on the negativity how about a more positive twist.

i think there is a bit of splitting here. i often think i am the worst friend for my friends. and it could be true. maybe i'm remmebering only the negative memories(hurtful incidents) i had with my friends.

maybe my friends will have something else to say about me. maybe they wont be splitting as 'he's all good' or 'he's all bad'

neither are borderlines angels nor demons...same with nons.