when people hurt you

Mrygan wrote:My dream is to live in the mountains, but I am afraid to be alone. Maybe we could start a tiny house BPD community in the mountains with optional opportunities to interact as much or as little as we need.

That's not too far from where I kind of hope to wind up, actually. I hate the routine of getting up every day and earning a living doing something I hate to do, which is everything. I want to be done living in cities, and every time a car alarm goes off, I scream inside my head.

The friend I was talking to yesterday mentioned that I should be on medication, and I think that yeah, medication would help me endure the things I don't want to deal with. But another part of me thinks logically, "why endure the things I don't want to deal with?" Why not remove those things and surround myself with the things that actually make me happy. Isn't that what people do?

I have some debts to pay off, after which I'll have more freedom to decide what would really make me happy.

If you let me join your commune I can build your houses.

joltaire wrote:If you let me join your commune I can build your houses.

Danieleaf wrote:Historically, my response to being hurt or even thinking that I can expect someone to be hurtful in the very near future is to retreat. I would simply sever contact and completely ghost that person.Then maybe, maybe a few years later I would think about it and realize that I probably over reacted. This was all prior to being aware of having any kind of mental health issues.

As far as sorting out how appropriate this kind of behavior has been, now that I know a few more things about myself...I ask myself if I could have such and such person in my life again right now. If the answer is no, I know that somewhere in that scenario I had good reason to decide that this person isn't a good addition to my life. The way I went about it could have been handled better, but in the end, I stick behind my decisions, for the most part.

I just thought that you said that well. Or, at least, it resonated with how I handle things...

Hi Mrygan,
First of all, I live in the mountains and its the best thing i ever did moving here from a city. here has a sense of peace its lovely, yes its lonely sometimes, but village people are great warm people when you get to know them

I know anger,frustration,anxiety,sorrow,betrayal,disrespect are all the strong emotions we all feel or have felt in the past, i explode into rage when i am constantly compared to and ex lover or his mother, i try to not let things like that bother me but i really cant help it, i feel not valued as a person in my own right.

All people are different yes, but we all can feel/experience hurt.
people have talents and traits of their own, and i think people deserve to be happy.

People can deliberately hurt for fun and i hate that, this world is greedy,selfish, and scary at times.
I don't forgive very easily i will admit, but depending on the situation, i can forgive in time.

P.S BPD Commune is a great idea for us that need to be alone when we needed to be, and to have support when we need the support, sometimes just a kind ear/a hug is all that is required sometimes. people that know what we are going through...im in if a commune is built