*TW* Do you substitute one self destructive behaviour

I have a diagnosis of BPD and lately I've noticed that if I can't use one self destructive behaviour to cope with my feelings then I just seem to use another one. I'm currently at home with my parents for the holidays and I can't cut or self harm as they know I do this and would probably find out about it. Consequently I've spent the last week binging/purging much more than I normally would. Does anyone else do this?

Welcome to the forum

Yes, definitely. I used to be a compulsive shoplifter. I had a very controlling boyfriend at the time who would not let me drink, so I shoplifted instead.

I've also used other things, marijuana, sex, reckless driving, anorexia....now I drink alcohol everyday. I want to stop, but just don't know how to go without something to deal with the self-destructive impulses.

Happy New Year

Yes, I do this too. I used to cut, but then I told my family about it and now they ask me every day if I've cut. They haven't asked to see my wrists since I first showed them, but I know they try to catch a glimpse to see if there's anything there. Instead, I've started starving myself. Its not as satisfying as cutting though.

Yep. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was using drinking as coping. Now that I don't drink anymore, I cut. Step in the right direction, huh?

I try not to act out, but that means that I have to endure hours of overwhelming anxiety, panic attacks and painfully obsessive thoughts. I try to intellectualize, understand these thoughts or discard them with rationality, but this ofc isn't a very effective method.

So most of the time it's just me living through this and waiting for my serotonine to kick in naturally until I am regulated again. I have not yet found a better method (maybe exercise?) for this. But I am usually euphoric after that and glad that I didn't act out and that I didn't do anything detrimental to myself or others.

When I stopped self-harming a couple of years ago, I would break things/kick in doors instead definitely not the best way of coping but thankfully that passed. I think I used to cut to relieve this unbearable tension that would build inside me and wouldn't go away until I did something reckless/self-destructive, and I still don't have a healthy way of dealing with that feeling when it comes up. these days it's more alcohol and sex though (moderately better? I think?)