Don't want exercise to mess with my numbness!

Need to exercise but don't feel like it. When I do, it sets in motion everything I've been trying to avoid thinking about and feeling. Does anyone else have the experience of some task or activity that undoes the numbness/emptiness? What do you do when everything in you wants to keep the numbness going, but that voice for health refuses to be silent.

I can ignore the emptiness, which is now tipping over into depression, when I'm working on my novel or performing. The effort that goes into working out feels overwhelming because there's no reward after. There's no food treats since I'm trying to keep my weight down, my husband and I aren't having sex and can barely talk without fighting, so there's nothing there for me. When I'm done posting this, I'm going to go work out, then go to a music event in the neighborhood, probably alone. If I wen with my husband I'd most likely get mad, alone I'll probably have a good time because I usually do when I go out alone or with girlfriends.

Going to work out now.