friend is being disrespectful and rude

Working for my friend lately....he's been using a rude tone with me, and being disrespectful. Should I beat his face into a bloody mess? I don't know how to deal with this..I'm going to lose a job and a friendship because I can't handle how he is acting.

He knows I have BPD. He's been treating me like I'm inferior, and I'm going to snap.

What to do?

I wouldn't be talking about it, I would have done it already. But since you have the self control to talk, I suggest taking your anger out on objects, not people. Then go watch a comedy and laugh your ass off.. and maybe have a couple drinks (optional because if I'm in an angry mood drinking usually makes it worse but for some people is relaxes them).

If you want some quality advice, I have come to the conclusion that people in general are TERRIBLE listeners and venting to PEOPLE just feels unproductive because you don't feel like you are being heard. If it is a matter of venting I have found that starting a video journal is helping me immensely, I can talk all I want and it feels like I am being heard, it feels like in a weird sense that the camera is a friend. If you want advice however, the forum is a good place to start.

Others might have better ideas. But for venting I highly recommend starting a video diary, at first its awkward then after a couple of times its like talking to a friend that is constantly listening, doesn't interrupt you and doesn't give stupid comments like 'just get over it, it's not a big deal' or 'you are totally over-reacting' which is not helpful at all.

The words Working for my friend says it all to me. Work is work and most people act differently at work no matter who they are. You have to seperate work from friendship.
But at work when people rude or ass-es it best just to keep saying in your head. ( what a f--king dick) and remember in future you can expect that person to be that way again. It something i do when its best just to pretend to be nice. and not see them the way they are at work.

Out side of work im always nice and respectfull, But if anyone not, i reflect back their behaviors and sometimes it twofold. or more.

When he goes for coffee, mount a knife to his chair, sharp side facing up
When he sleeps, put a centipede in his pant. If there's a fan above his chair, tie a rope to the fan's blade, and the other end of the rope to his ankle, then make the video and blackmail him for life to put it on youtube. With the money you extorted off him, bribe your boss and become promoted, then you be his boss and talk rudely to him

on a serious note, unfriend him, avoid talking with him, use formal conversation with him. folks with bpd are capable of making people addicted to them. He'll get the cue.

You are all so right! What great advice. I have very few friends left, because of my attitude. I don't want to lose the last friend I have, but if he is going to continue on in this manner, I will have to let him and the job go. I'd like to cover my hand in glass and pat him on the back a few times while saying "you are the best boss ever, yes you're better than me, and yes you have a better life, are you happy now?"

I think he thinks that because he has his own business, and I work there, and that he has not been hospitalized for mental problems, that he is better than me. Fair enough..honestly I would think the same thing if the shoes were on the other feet. But I would NOT treat him like I thought that. I treat everyone as equals, and never disrespect people unless they really are asking for it. I too had my own business in the past, and my employees just LOVED me. I was the boss I always wished my bosses would be. My buddy, (lets call him Dan, because thats his name,) is a horrible boss. He is the kind of person you'd secretly murder many different torturous ways (in your head of course)

I'm now questioning my ability at making friends. I didn't realize my friend was such a douchebag. I know we all have a touch of douchebag in us from time to time, but this guy is way overboard.

I think I like the idea of a video diary. I would make it, but not show anyone, but I'd make it available upon my death. Then my mourners can see what hell I endured through knowing them.

Thanks for all the replies. I think I'll just work, treat him like I would any common boss (with contempt), collect my pay, and go on my merry way. While I'm away I'll find new people to hang with. If he asks me to hang out, I'll tell him I only hang out with my friends.

Jaus tail...you made me laugh! Thanks!

Use interpersonal skills. Look up info on the interpersonal skills section of DBT. It's seriously so helpful.

Write down what you want to say and have a nice thorough think through of how you can communicate your thoughts to him without pissing him off. It feels awesome to let off steam and yell at someone, but it rarely gets you what you want. I'm assuming you want to keep the job.

I think whether someone is at work as a boss or off work as a friend, people should be respectful of others. One can be a strict boss and pull that position off respectfully.

May I watch the blood bath?