Scared about husband going camping overnight

My husband wants to go camping overnight with his friend and the idea scares me a lot. There would be no service and no way of contacting him. When he was gone visiting home last month, I did really poorly and used about every skill under the sun. I struggled a lot with abandonment stuff. I know that I'd be really anxious and upset if he went camping. I also feel bad telling him I'm afraid about him camping because I don't want my issues to get in the way of his life and enjoyment. I don't know what to do and I'm really confused and conflicted. I can't stop shaking.

Just force yourself to get through it. Cope however you need to while he's gone, but maybe ask for a shorter trip this time. You sound like you're too early on to rock the boat, so that's my best advice.

Even after 15 - 17 yrs, I still have to be careful. Hopefully you find someone who can accept BPD.

I think many womans would be afraid of that.

Dont let your diagnosis disqualify all your thoughts.

I am not telling you to ask him not to go, just to understand that your fear is common and that you are being mature.

Two suggestions:

1. Can you book yourself a short trip away with a friend at the same time that involves some group activity (like a learn to mountain bike weekend or a one day painting course or something like that) which would help to distract you?

If that's not an option, plan something that will occupy you - invite 6 friends round for dinner and cook them a massive 3 course dinner. Shopping, prep and cooking will occupy your mind.


2. Talk to your husband about how you feel but do it gently. Tell him that you really are NOT asking him to not go and you thought of not telling him but explore ways that could make you less anxious - a shorter trip or you organising something for yourself so you are both away at the same time.

What happened VMars? Which path did you take and what was the outcome? How do you feel now?

These kind of personal experiences are so helpful to me and help me figure out what works and what doesn't.

I wish I could help with this, however, almost anything anxiety related is almost impossible to rationalize your way out of it, I think.

Also, I don't know from a BPD point of view how fear of abandonment feels like.

Just endure it til you see everything it's fine, I guess. Take drugs, alcohol or supplements that target anxiety, if it helps, I guess.

Wish you well.

If its overnight, maybe you could try and pamper yourself and then get a good sleep alone. Try and think about it as a good thing where you can get a night off for yourself.

Plus, it will give him time to miss you