Empty? Lonely?

Sometimes I think these feelings will just swallow me up whole. I just feel so lost most of the time and separate from others. I know most of you would have felt the same more or less. . My best friend is so occupied with her boyfriend, which I completely understand but I barely see her these days. I don't have many friends.
I don't even want to be in a relationship,because I know I can't handle them. I just want these feelings to go away.
Every day I have off from work I spend in bed, I can't even get out of it. I try too, but I can't.
Just feels like a vicious circle... I feel like my life is going to flash past my eyes and I'll not progress or get better.

katwoman wrote:I don't even want to be in a relationship,because I know I can't handle them.

When you say relationship do you mean as in any sort of friendship or specifically a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship?

When you say you know you can't handle them, is it that you have a tough time dealing with the relationship when you are in it and feel relief when it is over. Or more the opposite you are good while in the relationship but always fearing it will end and then having a difficult time when it does?

katwoman wrote: I don't have many friends.

Do you want to have a larger circle of friends? I ask because some people I have met have felt like friendships are either scary or too much work and really been selective (and exclusive) with regards to who gets in there circle. Just curious if this is how it is with you,

katwoman wrote:Every day I have off from work I spend in bed, I can't even get out of it. I try too, but I can't.
Just feels like a vicious circle...

How do you feel when you are at work?

I mean a boyfriend and girlfriend relationship. I always fear abandonment so I live in constant panic of them leaving. I never show this fear to them but it feels like an internal battle most of the time.

With the circle of friends... I just wish I had more people to talk to that I trust, or that it didn't feel like such an effort to hang around with. I have many acquaintances... I can go out drinking and partying with them... But I'm not very comfortable around these people.

And work... Well, I try and concentrate and work hard as an escape. I have to deal with people a lot in my job, it brings me out of my shell.. I have to go to work, I don't have a choice so when I'm there I put on my big act.