Help? Theres so much wrong with me

My name is Taylor I have been diagnosed with social phobia,depression,eating disorder and borderline traits. I am on antidepressants (Prozac) and antipsychotics (Risperidone) and have been hospitalized, but am currently an outpatient.
I don't really know how to explain myself so:

. I have identity crisis's frequently. Basically I can be any one but myself, literally. I'll find find a target and I will literally try to become them. I'll change my appearance,interests,personal information,personality and I'll think of myself as living as them. My appearance,clothing/musical tastes and online accounts and in general how I present myself are constantly changing due to this.

. I am completely dependent on others. I need to be in some kind of relationship 24/7 even if it means being in an imaginary one. I always have a target who I believe will somehow save me from myself and then everything will be ok, therefore I'll tell myself that I'll stop sabotaging myself once i'm with them.

. I have a really bad habit of being an attention-seeker and self-victimizing myself (which i'm extremely ashamed of). I consciously and unconsciously emotionally manipulate others, mostly to get them to feel bad for me, therefore somewhat not hate me (though I know thats not true).

. I cannot control myself because i'm constantly not myself. I have these weird mood swings where I feel "out-of-person" and literally think a different way than what I'd usually think like. Theres Charcoal who's aggressive,daring and brave (which is the complete opposite of me). Then theres Cherry Blossom who is all about being overtly flirtatious and manipulative and she'll flirt with just about anyone in the room, which lands me into trouble later because people are greatly irritated by her advances. Last theres Meah who is calm,spiritual and has a very relaxed voice, i'm not her very often but when I am I usually don't really have any negative consequences afterwards because she's so laid-back and isn't one to get into trouble-making.
The point is I feel like I have absolutely no control over myself and am actually quite afraid of myself.I always think "why did I do that" and get angry at myself after one of my weird mood trances ends and I realize I did something really destructive. And sometimes I can't really remember what exactly I did, like I know this morning I did something self-destructive but I seriously can't remember what, and that scares me.

Overall I just feel like i'm a disease, I hate my diagnoses and I hate myself. Sometimes I'll try to pretend that there's nothing wrong with me, but its impossible because I can't escape my mind.

[I apologize if this was submitted 2 times, I had some technical difficulties and did not mean it to]

Hi EmbraceUgly,
you forgot a couple of things. You are very hard on yourself. You are a survivor and you are very creative.
Dare look at yourself from another perspective. You need to be on your team, even if this is only a one person team. you are very specific over your pecularities but you need to use the same capacity to analize to bring out and to share your positive side.
it can get better!!

i'd say there's nothing wrong in having these different personalities as long as you can control them

at times one is required to be brave and courageous, like in an emergency situation
with your love interest, its fun to be flirtatious
and at solemn events like funeral its appropriate to be calm

you have to learn how to control them
write down the thoughts of each personality, write them down and read them. dont fight them but speak with them that the thoughts are inappropriate, dont yell at these personalities.

i have an anxious kid within me, i do exercise to fulfill his dreams. i dont yell at him but i tell him that its ok, that i'm there for him

i used to have identity crisis but now i'm ok with it. i mean i've realized that identity is what i do and not what i think. my self esteem goes high after a shave, exercise, jog or any achievement so that's my identity. at times i still freak out with the changing voices in my head but as long as they arent giving me any trouble its ok

its ok to have different identities as long as your friends with all of them.