I Feel Trapped

I feel like I'm trapped in the wrong life.

So on Tuesday I spent almost 30 minutes at my monthly psych appt rambling about everything that went wrong in the past 4 weeks. I kept screaming about how no one in my life is supportive, my husband is an idiot, I feel pressured to stay in my marriage due to not having a job right now, and etc. When all was said and done I finally agreed to go back on Celexa. I'm on 20mg daily and I'm feeling calmer, but I know that this life isn't for for me. I need to get a divorce, move back in with my parents, and start over. I'm no longer afraid of the consequences and the wrongness of my lifestyle is making me feel suffocated.

I'm sure my husband and I can stay friends, but he's not the man for me. I feel like I'm giving up on a dream that could possibly still come true. The spark is gone and who knows if it was really ever there. I'll call and talk to my mom tonight about my next move. My parents want me back (my dad is insisting I come back home). I guess the medication is working.

feeling trapped like a caged animal is good for NO one. you deserve happiness and if it takes a few steps to get there, it's worth it. what does your therapist think about your thoughts about divorce and starting over? have they offered you any guidance on what steps to make first and how best to approach things?

(((hugs))),

wineaux

The psych I saw was actually a medical student, but at the end I talked to the head psychologist there. He's a guy and he prescribed my medication. There was no plan of action given to me whatsoever. I'm dealing with the county doctors because of no health insurance so I'm on my own.

I might end up back in the mental hospital, but at this very moment I do feel safe living in the same apartment as my husband for the time being. My next psych appointment is in late September so we'll see what I can change before then.