BPD Trait?

I want to know, is it a BPD thing to ignore advice? Or not listen to advice??

Hevski wrote:I want to know, is it a BPD thing to ignore advice? Or not listen to advice??

hahahahhahhahahhaaaa!!!!!! yes. no. maybe? i've doled out a lot of advice over the years...i've also heard a lot of advice over the years. have i followed all of it? of course not! let's take for instance yesterday...i was being snubbed by someone and it was tearing me apart because i was on the verge of being abandoned. instead of holding my ground and controlling my impulsive nature i reached out for them and got completely called out. after all was said and done i got what i sought after but i made some people angry that spent lots of time with me advising me against it.

i think it's a combination of things that get us to that point though hevski...also we can be quite manipulative sometimes and our succinct abilities to get what we want out of situations that others can't. le sigh.

I can't say for others, but I know I'll try to listen to advice, but end up not being able to follow it because I can't do it on the spot. I think this is a huge reason why we don't/can't follow advice sometimes.

There's also phases where I think "Who says I need advice?! I'm fine!".
Not a good mindset to have.

forget bpd, for anyone it would depend who is giving the advice, what is the topic

mark asks his dad about bike riding
david asks hi college professor advice on how to study before exams just to ask a question, kiss a**
victoria asks her friend's neighbor advice on cooking because the neighbor has done some course in cooking

it all depends on who is the advisor and what relation n other factors, what is the topic

as a bpd, i got 0 and 1 states. i dont like advice when i'm in 1, when i'm in 0 i crave for advice, but dont follow.

Well, it's like this..

People would tell me that I was in a bad relationship.. But I didn't want to hear.. I listened to all of the advice, processed it and took it on board.. But I didn't listen to their experience or what they were saying about him.. Because I loved him, or so I thought and wanted things to work out.. I talked to so many people, but didn't listen and in the end I couldn't even remember what I'd said and to whom.. It got so bad I was accused of Peter and the Wolf ing... Which wasn't true, I just didn't like they were saying.. Everything I said was truth..

And then with my ex.. He said I'd been self-harming for ages (I hadn't, he only said that after I realised myself that I was).. But there were many times when I told him something someone had said to me.. And he'd say "I told you that a million times, you never listen to anything I say" and he said that a lot.. I didn't mean to make him feel undervalued like that.. I suffer from selective hearing too I think..

That's why I asked.. I suppose I worry about what is the right thing to do, it's the whole staying in bad relationships thing. I didn't want to give up..

Hi Wineaux!