Hi. I'm New Here...Need Help.

Hi,

I guess I was diagnosed with BPD back in October. Since then I've been in DBT. It does make sense to me, and I could see how it might help. I've been trying to use the skills. But I feel like the skills never really make me feel better. Just help to maybe avoid a crisis. But I still feel horrible and empty inside especially because I feel like my friends don't give a sh*t about me. Honestly, I feel like I have no real friends right now. My supposed best friend doesn't even want to hang out with me. Hardly texts to see how I am. Something bad happened to me back in October and since then I have been a wreck. My friends know and I think they cared for a little while. After I told them I tried to commit suicide. But they don't even care anymore.

I know that when something sets me off my emotions go really quickly and I have SI. I have urges a lot to commit suicide, but I've only really tried twice. And it was because I was really upset over something both times.

I don't know if I should be sharing this because I don't want to upset anyone, but today I tried to leave my house and go into the woods and OD on some meds I have. Unfortunately (imo), everyone in my house is constantly watching me. I told them I was going to the store, but my brother chased after me. I don't even feel like anything triggered this.

hi there! and welcome to our little cozy nook of PF...cookies to the left, kleenex to the right. first of all, i'm glad you're here. you're in safe company and we are here to listen. if you're in a place where you have a plan, i urge you to seek help and check yourself in. have you contacted your T? is your T aware that you've been feeling this way?

the situation with your best friend that happened in october...have you been able to speak of it? work through it? based on what you've alluded to, it looks like the answer to that might be no.

many folks here have found DBT to be an amazing help, but as with everything, it takes time. continue practicing, it can only get better. it is a method of coping and healing and will lead you down the path to recovery. hopefully soon you'll have that moment of clarity where it just clicks.

e-hugs,

wineaux

Hi

I'm assuming T means therapist? My therapist knows about what happened in October. It doesn't have anything to do with my friend. This guy I was with sent private pictures of me to my friends on facebook. I don't really talk about it a lot to my therapist because it makes me very nervous and I'm still quite scared that he will come back to ruin my life again.

I tell her about friend issues that I have. I'm new to therapy and I'm very shy. I've always held stuff in rather than talking about how I feel. I feel like every time I talk about myself I start crying! Then I can't express how I feel properly. ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Something has been bothering me lately and I really wanted to tell my psychiatrist about it yesterday, but I just couldn't work up the courage. And I don't know if I can. My parents wanted to take me to this centre so I'm safe, but I don't know. I feel like I should because even now as I'm writing this I am starting to feel worse. But I have a hard time asking for help, especially from people I don't know.