I was typing up a comment to a forum here abouts and i realized this would be a good thing to put in as my generic "beware of this" thing-y, so...


I will also warn... my triggers are many and scattered all about my mind. IF y'all see me talking of dying, killing myself, etc. Do NOT freak out. I have severe despair bouts, but in twenty-six years of dealing with all this have not attempted suicide. And I have ample means. Doctors LOVE to hand out pills that are lethal if you know how to mix and match with the wrong OTHER things. Weapons, places to use them, etc. I have it all and have had it for YEARS. So... the warning is this, i freak out and start talking despair, suicide, wanting to die... pretend I didn't say A THING. Okay? I become fixated at these times (got to love autism at times like that) and i know NOTHING that breaks me out that involves talking ABOUT how i feel. The more i talk about it, the worse I get until i shutdown. So trying to discuss it with me does not help. Get me back on the topic of HELPING somewhere else, that is my secret way out of these things. Doesn't always work, but it sometimes does.

Doctors and professionals start screaming and freaking out at these times, so... I mean i've been thrown out of offices and refused future appointments over this stuff IRL, thus why i'm here.