I've came to the conclusion that this is the best way for me to live, I'm tired of trying to impress people, I've been trying to do that my whole life and it has not gotten me anywhere. I've realized the illusion of our existence here, like attracts like, I will use this to my advantage. All these negative thoughts are there because I allowed them to be, I will remove that cloud of thinking, and they will be gone. Life is whatever your mind allows it to be.