Ive not had a very good weekend I've done things I shouldn't have and now I'm so embarrassed by it! I let myself get dragged down by people around me, and that frustrates me! I wish I didn't let things people say get to me, but it's so hard not to. I have such a bad temper, I get so angry over things. I feel like I'm going to explode!

Alot of people call me weird and a freak, they say their joking but I don't think they are. I do do weird things, but I cant help it. I don't thi k the stuff I do is unhealthy, it's just silly things. Like I only like even things, symetrical things, and stuff that have an order ect. So people say all the ti e that I have OCD but I dint think I do, then It will get to me. I don't know how igot this cause ithas nothing to do with my weekend.

I've read a lot of books lately, and when I'm reading I get so lost in the book. I feel like the character I'm reading about, generally I wish I was! I always seem to get so engrossed in it that I dream about it, I even have like a fantasy going in my head. Ido that a lot actually, im always really skinny and beautiful and then there will be a really hot guy who sweeps me of my feet i think mabey im just a hopeless romantic! I wish I could have some romance in the real world

Katrina x

I've been thinking a lot today about how no one actually really knows me! I'm so different with everyone, like on here I'm generally boring, miserable and moaning. Then with my friends I try to always be fun, outgoing and happy. Then with family I'm either pissed off, angry or just ok. Theres not one person who knows every side of me, people are close but I'd never let them know about comming on here ect.

I often find I pretend to be someone I'm not, like I don't lie or anything I just act differently so that I fit in. I'm so scared of rejection that I don't want to be myself incase no one likes me. I'm most honest on here only because no one here really knows me and the chances of me meeting anyone from here is extremely slim!

Also today I've been thinking about less fortunate people than myself, it it makes me so mad! I can't bear the thought of a child being hurt, or a family on the streets, or the amount of people dying due to poverty. And what annoys me the most is that there's not really anything I can do to help! Another thing is cruelty to animals, I can't stand that either, why is there so many cruel people in the world?

Katrina x

I am so happy today x

I can't decide wether using this site is helping me, or hindering me! I come on, write how I'm feeling then Im sitting feeling bad about myself! I feel like I come on here more than I do anything else and that can't be healthy! Life's tough, but I'm not the only person to strugle! There are people who are far worst of than me, all the famine,Poverty and war in the world and Im feeling sorry for myself about stupid things! I think I just need to stop taking the little I have for granted and get on with life!

I'm so lonely right now, I just want someone to talk to and tell me everything's going to be alright! The thing is though, I bring it on my self. I seem to push people away, I don't know how or why but everyone keeps disappearing from my life. It's hard, I want someone who I can talk to about my problems, but I don't want anyone to know about them. And then if I were to tell a friend I wouldnt want to go on because I wouldnt want to be talking about myself all the time and seem selfish! I'm probably more of a listener than talker, people always tell me their problems, it frustrates me because things people complain about are so trivial!