if you can afford it, i recommend a good psychiatrist. i am in the same boat about seeing one, mainly cause i've had so many issues in the past with them and i realize their just a person.

Welcome to the forum, la187. I'm sorry you haven't had more replies. We do most of our chat in the forums themselves. And mostly use blogs for self reflective posting. Because, at least for me. I find it hard to remember who's blog I've posted to. There's no way to track conversations like there is in the forum.

You could try starting a new thread in living-with-mental-illness/ perhaps? That is our general area for discussions of all sorts. Or, this is NOT a diagnosis. But you might find some common ground in the histrionic-personality/ forum. No need to have a formal diagnosis to post there, or anywhere. If it feels comfortable to you. Or you find something interesting to comment on. Go for it.

You're sixteen so you're developing sexual interests and sexual frustration. Everyone is interested in something, you might just be interested in dom-sub play without the tools. I mean it's hard to tell unless you've had that kind of sex. It also might be a desire for power, like a psychological aspect. Like you might feel power deprived in one sense and so in the sexual sense you want that power over men.


You're not a pervert, you're just human. You just learn to accept the thoughts and move on.

We're sexual beings. It's natural for us to look at it. That doesn't mean you want to have sex with your mom, you just took a look. I mean it shouldn't be a concern.

Regarding the sexual thoughts you're having. No one wants to hear this but you're sixteen so your hormones are on a rise and you're probably a little sexually frustrated. It's natural.

You're not hurting your boyfriend by these, unless you cheat on him you're fine. Even if you have thought about having sex with other guys, as long as you don't act on it you are being loyal to him and care for him. Just try to accept the thoughts and not take too much importance in them. It will make your anxiety rise.

I don't think there is anything wrong with falling in love with either boys or girls. If this makes you feel right, you should go with it, I think. You seem to be feeling very well about this, try not to let that go because of your crush's gender good luck!