I'm not sure what I should do, I had a dream and my therapist was in my dream, by the way the dream was NOT sexual. I am wondering if I should tell him about my dream or not????

I am a 19 year old girl and I have this male character about my age in my head, he has a name and characteristics and personality and everything already thought out for him. He's not alone, he has a bunch of friends...also in my head. I switch mainly between him and me, his friends are all just there for some reason.

When I was in middle school I was bullied and alone so I started "creating friends" to entertain me during lunches...now, everytime I find myself feeling lonely, they're automatically there. Sometimes they're there when I'm hanging out with other (real) people but that doesn't happen too often.

I started out thinking I have DID but now I'm confused, I can tell him to leave and he will but then he comes back again. It's mostly him talking to me and giving me advice and helping me but sometimes I actually become him and I end up just sitting on my sofa, staring at the wall, or walking around my room living in this imaginary world in my head. Sometimes I end up making faces or using body language without realizing that I am. Sometimes when something happens to me (when I am him) that saddens "him", I physically cry. Or I can feel pain (I don't know how to explain that).

I often find myself isolating myself from friends and family just to be him in that world.

I'm just wondering if anyone else experiences this? What is this? I can't seem to put a word on it. Also, I have no idea why I'm suddenly identifying with a male...

I haven't seen any posts similar to this so if someone experiences this I would be really glad if they could share cause I am so confused all the time.



- Penny

So i've never written a post ever on any forum, ever, and since things have changed for me recently, i'd decide to give this a go. Might not come back to this but i want to get whats in my head out there and see if anyone has anything to say about me and my problems.
My problems: I care about my family too much. I'm almost certain that I have depression, mild anxiety and a myriad of other mental health problems but I've never been properly diagnosed because I care about my family too much to have them worry about me at all. I also come from a culture where mental health is not a 'real' problem, but rather a thing for the weak or the bored.
I think about death a lot BUT i'm not suicidal. I'm fine with death and i'm not scared of it but I would never be able to go through with it as long as my parents are alive because I can't put them through all that pain. If they died though, I would have not much of a reason to keep going, but that is not the point of this post.
I've always been very aware of my issues and i've always been able to talk myself down in my head like there was a third person that tells the two conflicting voices in my head what to do. This third voice sounds like a trusty friend, insightful parent, or even a advising counsellor, when i think about it. This voice knows what people views as normal and suppresses my arguing voices to make me seem 'normal'. It usually takes effort but I know it works because everyone thinks I'm still this smiley, happy girl, which really hasn't been the case since about 7 years ago (when my first encounter of death in the family happened)
My dog (who's been with me for almost 15 years) died yesterday and I was sad but it wasn't a fearful, regretful sadness. It was more of a "i'll miss you" and "we've spent good time together" happy sadness, though it was really sudden and shocking. I still miss him but I don't think I'm doing too bad. My parents on the other hand haven't been able to sleep, eat, not spontaneously cry, and not talk about morbidity every couple of hours. They also hug me a lot because they think its comforting for me, and probably themselves too.
I guess what I'm saying is that is it weird that I'm so aware of what I'm almost sure I have? Does this mean I don't have these mental health issues because it doesn't really affect my daily life and I know what triggers it, how to control it, and what works/doesn't work? Do other people with mental health issues experience this too?
An analogy (if you're still reading): I deal with my problems like dealing with my period. When it starts, I know what I can do to not let it leak out for the world to see. I know what the best way to deal with the dirty pad/tampon is, to chuck it out (feeling all my feelings/non-feelings but in a physical location where no one will see me then throw them out or at least leave them where they can't be seen). I clean up after myself and flush the bloody mess away (make sure no one can physically see or pick out that I have problems at any point of any time)
What do you think?

Is it Possible? YES

So what is it that is possible? Right to the point. What I am saying is possible is that the deep amount of sadness and depression you are presently in can be changed. Not in 10 weeks but in 10 minutes. Sure , right, this person is way out of their mind and I am not going to keep reading is what your saying. STOP. Keep reading, I did not say eliminated in 10 minutes but changed. After the ten 10 minutes you are on a road to wellness and in that same day you will start to experience major changes throughout your body and mind. Yeah right. I would not write this if I have not experienced it myself for one full week.( referring to number 2, breathing and exercise )Do I know the pain of depression? To the deepest levels imaginable. Not only in the mind but the body. Imagine taking a 10 inch giant cutting knife to your chest everyday for a full month and for every second of the day you are seeing yourself killing yourself. Maybe you don't have to imagine but at least now know your reading thoughts of someone who knows your pain. Spending years in agony and torture with only one thing driving me. A higher cause or purpose higher then myself( which can be a loved one, animals included, helping people , etc) So all that I can do now is share what I have learned. Since we live in an age of instant information I will write down ten of the most important factors for change to take place.

1)Desire to take action to make the change and giving up any habit of fear and doubt. Meaning just give something a try and see what happens. You hear this a lot but it is absolutely true. Once you commit, something will happen that breaks a pattern or a state your in that you don't want to be in.
2) Using your body and breath to instantly make an impact on your present state( exercise, walk run, jumping jacks, weight lifting, push ups,etc) this can help with anxiety as well. What I am relearning is what a deeper impact the use of my body and breath then me trying to think myself out of something. Even completely changing my posture can cause something positive to happen. Cant walk or run? Try standing or sitting and lift your arms and move them like your rowing a boat.( both arms at the same time) Breath in through the mouth while pulling and breath out while your releasing. Try this at first for 7 to 10 times and see what happens. You will get energy. Throughout the body and mind. Do it again if you can or until you get to that state. If it doesn't happen after two attempts , stop,it will effect you within an hour. Breathing is key . Your a smoker? Try it anyway. It will be a great way to start valuing your breath. Need to relax? Breath in through the nostrils, hold a few seconds then exhale deeply. This I would not overdue , maybe two times, because you need to get used to it and it is very powerful. Take it from someone who doubted this for a long time but then tried it. It works. It gives you the charge your going to need to fight the bad condition your in. The rowing , breathing exercise can be done as much as you want. The nostril breathing takes some building up to. Stretching for a minute or two is excellent as well. Want to wake up and feel better instantly? Try some cold water and rub it over your face a few times, even try rubbing it over your upper body for a minute. Try warm water for relaxing. About exercise , if you have not done it for a long while, just do it for a very short time. Eventually you will be able to work up to more intensity. Remember BREATHE.
3) When your thinking is bad get into someone elses thoughts that are much better and positive and uplifting( book, music, you tube etc)
4) Its often said that fear is the main reason that holds people back from making a change or taking action. As true as it is, its doubt that holds us back just as much if not more. Please stop doubting and start trying.
5) Think of three options( you might think of more) that you have to break the...

[ Continued ]

Until recently, I never viewed my introversion as much of problem. I was told at work that I "need to be more social". This really struck a cord with me because I never thought that as I began my adult life my introversion may limit my success . So I decided to start this blog and chronicle my journey of becoming 'more social'.

Why are you so quiet? He must me hiding something...

Now this is easier said than done of course. My whole life people have been telling me, 'you're so quiet', 'you should talk more' or my new favorite 'be more social'. It's gotten to the point where some people feel uncomfortable around me because I'm so quiet. What is it that makes them so uncomfortable? Is it that my behavior or lack there of, is so unusual they just can't stand it? Is it that I'm some psycho who's going to snap at any moment? Is it the natural human tendency to be afraid of someone who's not like you? Not my problem right? They should be more understanding. Well unfortunately in a world of extroverts it is my problem. As much as I would love to live in a world where everyone accepts each other the way they are, that's just not reality. It's an extroverts world and if I'm going to thrive and not just survive, I've got to get to work and figure something out. So I'm going to be more 'social'. I'm not sure what that will look like, but in the following months, if not years, I will try and look deeper into the complex relationship that introverts and extroverts have and attempt different strategies for becoming more 'social'.

Why is it that quiet people make others feel uncomfortable?

Please share your thoughts.