so my boyfriend of a year and a half has bipolar disorder. We've broken up and fought many times over the past but everything always goes back to normal once he's done with that particular cycle. I know it sounds awful to go through but I am willing to and it is worth it to me. I'd never hold it against him because I've done my fair share of learning about the disorder and I know that he can't help it. I love him and I want to see him happy and I know I make him happy it's just when he gets moody it's always me. And I know that when he doesn't know what's wrong he's going to take it out on the person closest to him which is me, and I know I can't do anything about it, and that sucks. We've talked about his disorder before and he realized that I'm the only one who's there for him.

Now getting to what's going on right now, we hadn't fought in two months and everything was perfect and I knew that it was long overdue for him to go through a depressive, angry or manic cycle. Last Sunday I saw him and everything was fine, then that night when he was working he texted me and told me he was depressed, I know better than to ask him why or what's wrong so I just told him that if he needs me I'm here but if he needs his space I understand. He told me that he needed some space he just didn't want to have to say it, so we didn't talk because I wanted to respect that he needed space. On valentines day, that tuesday, I didn't want to waste my card so I drove the hour to see him and I put it on his doorstep and I left, as to not bother him. In the middle of the night he sent me a long text saying how he needs someone more mature and how I'm too negative and how he wants to break up. I'm neither of those things. He said he's on a path to self discovery as well. After we talked about that I asked if he got my card and he said yes and no, that he got it but he didn't read it, he hid it from himself in case he has a change of heart like he does other times with the things I give him when stuff like this happens.

We didn't talk all week and then today, Saturday, I don't know why but I had to say how I felt. So I sent him this long thing about how I felt and he was really nasty about it (which I was expecting). I just needed him to think about what he's doing. Also all week he has been tweeting all these sad song lyrics or he sounds happy. And in the past he's seemed happy and he would be out with his friends having a good time and not talking to me but that's expected and he'd always come back. The last time I told him how I felt and how his bipolar disorder was affecting me (because he knew he was bipolar he just had no idea what it meant) he got really angry at first but he called me later and told me that I was right and that he was sorry.

Everyone I've tried talking to about this just tells me I need to tell him to go on medication. He's tried it and doesn't like it and it's not my place to push him to do so. I know the real reasons he's upset are because he's a 20 year old boy who thinks his life is over because he hasn't started college yet, and I've been trying to help him to go to college, and I'm in no way trying to hold him back. I know he's just going through a cycle and he's not being himself right now and all of the other times he's always come back. It's just never lasted this long. I know it can't be the same every time but I just wanted to see some other opinions.

For now I just know I need to give him the space he needs and respect that and hopefully he'll come back sooner or later. I've been told I should leave him countless times by others but that's not what I want to do in the least bit.

Opinions? Advice?

Whole of my life I know that I am unique. Since I was 7 years old I can feel that I am always out of place from other children. I can't feel any deep connection. I was just always quiet and shy.
My situation at home is that I have a parents whose having an incredibly expectation from me since I was always in 1st section in the class. My mother is always spoiling me(also having codependency tendency), my father will never listen to anyone aside from himself and always having a rough words(narcissistic tendency) and I have a big brother who I think having autism with narcissistic personality disorder who is a big bully in my life that always abuse me physically and verbally.

My brother abuse me a lot verbally(threatening, bullying, devaluing) almost everyday since I was 13 I already used silent treatment in our relationship till now that I was 20. Thanks a lot since he moved to other place now.

When I was 16 and I am in college I went far away from home to study in university. This is the time that I can really conclude that I have something inside of me. I became so depressed, but I don't want to commit suicide. All of the characteristics of covert narcissists I did.



___ I can become entirely absorbed in thinking about my personal affairs, my health, my cares or my relations to others.
___ My feelings are easily hurt by ridicule or the slighting remarks of others.
___ When I enter a room I often become self-conscious and feel that the eyes of others are upon me.
___ I dislike sharing the credit of an achievement with others.
___ I feel that I have enough on my hand without worrying about other people's troubles.
___ I feel that I am temperamentally different from most people.
___ I often interpret the remarks of others in a personal way.
___ I easily become wrapped up in my own interests and forget the existence of others.
___ I dislike being with a group unless I know that I am appreciated by at least one of those present.
___ I am secretly "put out" or annoyed when other people come to me with their troubles, asking me for their time and sympathy.
___ I am jealous of good-looking people.
___ I tend to feel humiliated when criticized.
___ I wonder why other people aren't more appreciative of my good qualities.
___ I tend to see other people as being either great or terrible.
___ I sometimes have fantasies about being violent without knowing why.
___ I am especially sensitive to success and failure.
___ I have problems that nobody else seems to understand.
___ I try to avoid rejection at all costs.
___ My secret thoughts, feelings, and actions would horrify some of my friends.
___ I tend to become involved in relationships in which I alternately adore and despise the other person.
___ Even when I am in a group of friends, I often feel very alone and uneasy.
___ I resent others who have what I lack.
___ Defeat or disappointment usually shame or anger me, but I try not to show it.

Link to the above information: http://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/23-signs-youe28099re-secretly-a-narcissist-masquerading-as-a-sensitive-introvert/

I will admit. It's like reading my self. . .


last two months ago. While watching youtube I suddenly came up with "How to know a secret narcissists". First I was just having fun but when I literally looked at it. That's me. So I researched it and found the questions above.

Talking of being gifted. I'm not just telling this since I am a narcissists 'cause I literally have evidences that I am a gifted. I take an online IQ test and I range in a gifted person. I also members musical bands, marching band, Rondalla(string instrument players) and I always excel and excellent in this area. I also always competing in chess competition and got 2nd place in national level. And a very good math thinker. I am not telling lies but it's up to you if you will. Since I am an ultimate pathological lair I might lying.

But this is where I am confused since gifted and covert narcissists...

[ Continued ]

Ive been struggling with depersonalization for a few months now. It began after a year long 24/7 battle with extreme social anxiety and fear. My brain has shut down and i dont feel fear anymore or nervousness. Not even when talking to people. I feel very dettached and unhuman. I dont feel real. I cant even recall the last moment of happiness i found. I feeel relaxed and peaceful but unable to relate to anyone and have a very profound lack of interest in socializiong. Although i dont really feel emotion i can tell i am experiencing symptoms closer related to panic disorder - like difficulty breathing , tightened blurry vision, tensed jaw, etc. the most disturbing apsect of this to me is that i sincierely believe i have no personality, quirks, opinions, interests, or dislikes. Nothing moves me and i can not seem to make my mind up about anything simple or large because i really feel internally that i just dont have a preference for anythinng at all. I have no sense of self to be honest. I often feel transparent and itd hard to feel like you have a relationship with anyone when you cant process that they truly want to talk to you, or that they are actually addressing you . This is hard to explain but if anyone feels the same way it would be very helpful to hear.

What is your definition of psychology ?

Hi, I'm a new member and have registered in the hope of finding a better understanding and hopefully some peace regarding my intimate relationship with my half sister.

I was adopted at birth and met my biological mother and two half sisters 6 years ago (I was 38 at the time). My two half sisters (the eldest was 28 and the youngest was 25) (and no-one else) never knew of my existence. After my mother disclosed and discussed my "re-appearance" with them, we met for the first time in 2006. From the very first moment, there was a very special bond between my eldest half sister and me. Although I dearly love my youngest half sister and we have a great relationship, which is very supportive and loving, we do not have a physical attraction to each other and we do not share the same level of emotional "understanding" that I share with my eldest half sister.

From the first moment on, my eldest half sister and I shared an amazing bond. I live in a different country to them (my mother and two half sisters), but each time we get to see each other, we have an ability to enter each other's souls in an instant, as if we have never been apart. The "connection" between us has always contained an element of physical attraction, but we never acted on it, nor discussed it. In each other's presence, we were however always stunned by the fact that no-one else picked up on it, since it always felt (and still does) like it was almost "tangible".

In 2008, our relationship became sexual and on each trip since then, we have enjoyed the most amazing intimate moments both she and I have ever experienced. First and foremost, we are truly soul mates and we share an acceptance of each other, that neither of us have ever experienced anywhere else. Our physical relationship is not our primary attraction, but flows from the amazing intimacy we share emotionally. If it were possible and because of society's views regarding relationships like these, we'd choose to exist as "just" half brother and sister, but we both understand that we'd be lying to ourselves if we pretended this to be true.

We are both Christians and love our churches and our communities. I don't have a problem with our relationship in view of my relationship with God, but my sister does struggle with it from time to time. We also understand the consequences (perhaps not fully) of our relationship, both in a community and in our family.

We have not shared our relationship with anyone and my hope is to enter into meaningful discussion regarding our situation, so that I may better understand our options. There is so much more to say, but this will do for a start.