Hello. I have been diagnosed with anxiety for a few years now. I am a sixteen year old girl, and I often struggle with intrusive thoughts. My latest anxiety has been sexual thoughts, and feeling guilty about everything. For example, my mom was doing something (I don't even remember what) and was sitting down and was in her underwear, though i couldn't tell if she was naked or not. I looked over at her for whatever reason and just kind of instinctively looked down at her crotch area (I have no idea why I do that when I accidentally see someone naked, even a family member) and afterwards, I felt like I looked too long or it was creepy of me. I have no attraction to my mother or anything. But my anxiety has been making me worry about it all day. I even kind of forced myself to glance at hers and other people's butts to prove to myself that it wasn't weird and they're just body parts, etc. But this kind of thing happens to me constantly, especially when I'm tired. I also always feel guilty and like I'm hurting my boyfriend for having these thoughts and doing these things. Is it weird that I glanced at my mom like that? I'm sorry if this is a strange question, but I appreciate your answers. Peace and love.

you see, I've liked him for some time now but never went for it cause I used to think he was weird. (attractive though) but for the past few months him and I have been really talking. & he told me he has ASPD which I've now been researching a lot because I genuinely care for him and want to make sure he's like you know, okay?
I can't tell if he likes me or not or if we're going anywhere though? I've expressed to him many times how I like him and he thinks its odd/weird? is that bad? He let me take his V-Card but then afterwards said it felt like it didn't even happen because he doesn't really have "emotions". I'm so confused, he says he likes being with me and cuddling with me and he wants to see me like every chance he can & he blows up my phone when he gets on break/wakes up before I do or if I'm not messaging back. he's not mean or rude, he's not addicted to drugs. the only thing about him is he acts sort of emotionless like he doesn't like expressing his feelings/getting emotional? and he doesn't like kissing either which is weird cause most guys his age (19) do you know?
I really am so confused and I think I'm falling in love with him, he's the first guy I've liked since my last relationship which was a year & took a lot of healing time so I'm afraid.. should I keep going and see where it goes without getting my hopes up? or does it sound like I should just give up..? (I rather not) but I'd like to hear opinions from others with ASPD and your feelings about love.. have you ever been in love or felt strongly about someone?

Hello all, I'm new here.
My sister gave birth and had really bad Postpartum Depression and she was already diagnosed with Bipolar disorder before hand. I have raised my nephew since he was born. She has a boyfriend, a little over a year now, and has recently moved to a different town. About 2 hours from where I live. I barely get to see him anyways because I have a very demanding job.
I had him over the summer for a week. He told me some information, and with my job I am a mandatory reporter (with a reporting number), and I ended up calling CPS on her. I went up at the beginning of December to see him for his birthday and give him his birthday gift.
She allowed me to see him for about an hour. After that she asked to talk when he was asleep. She asked why I had called CPS, I told her the circumstances, what was said to me, and the face that I'm a mandatory reporter. She told me "I'm your sister, you should have confronted me first." I again tried to explain to her if I don't report child abuse, I could not only go to jail but lose my licenses. She will probably never understand, but now she will not "ever" let me see him again.
I miss my nephew terribly. I hate that she has her thumb on him, and all control over him. Also, I fear for his safety around her boyfriend. I expressed this to CPS as well. The outcome was that they did a wellness check. They said, until they see bruises or broken bones they really can't do anything.
Recently, 8 years old now, they have been leaving him home alone. Unfortunately in Arizona there is no legal age at which you can leave a child home alone. But, if something happens to the child it is considered child neglect.
....... Ugh..... Stressful situation

Hello everyone! Here is another post that I wonder if anyone can relate to?

Now I have recognized that I do have some good qualities as I began to understand and rebuild myself but I find that I have also exploited these qualities in the past, distant and and not so distant. At I times I have even justified my actions with these qualities for example talking myself out of returning a phone call from my mother, I'll tell myself that attending to my life changes are more important, I can't disrupt this noble and righteous work, then anger will justify the frustration of having to make these life changes then ill hold her responsible for my current emotional and mental struggles. Ill think she doesn't deserve to speak with me, she deserves to suffer like me, she should be punished. (I know very immature, Its as if bpd is one the more extreme symptoms of immaturity)

Or my sadness will justify my depression after acknowledging how sensitive I am. For an example I'll use avoiding my mothers call again, I'll think to myself that I deserve to be alone for all the stress and pain I have caused others, that there is so much growth that needs to transpire before I can effectively communicate with anyone. That I don't have anything worth saying, that I don't want to worry anyone with my issues and ineptitude. (Really I'm just removing a level of responsibility and accountability over my own actions that I believe I'm too exhausted for, too depressed to invest my energy in to)
This is where My Fear interjects sometimes, creating thoughts like I would just embarrass myself if I try to educate or inform my mother on my current condition because I don't really know myself like i once believed I did, I'll sound uninformed to her, like I'm not trying to change, or I'm not taking the growth that needs to transpire seriously enough. (The shame would be too much to bear apparently is what Im thinking here, once again I see myself hiding from a level of responsibility because of the fear of emotional shame, which is related to heightened level of emotional sensitivity leaving me fearful of many personal and social situations/confrontations)

Another thing I have become recently hip to is the projection of these insecurities on he world. What I believe people are thinking about me or fear that they may be thinking, really are just what i deep down think about myself. And it does not stop at people i project my demeanor on to all things, in my eyes the world has become as tumultuous as my soul, A place where joy does not exist only struggle and heartache. I believe by improving my perception of self my projection on to the world will also improve, my perception of the world will improve and i will see the beauty of life again.

Hello I'm a teen boy and I'm having a real tough time I'm not 100% sure I have OCD but when I was younger I would always have thoughts of dying and got really scared and frightened of it and also stuff in my room I liked it to be in order also my dad had OCD symptoms when he was younger like if he felt a certain way he would walk on the white lines on a road so he'd fell better and stuff like that so since I was young boy I can remember I was always into girls I fantasised and felt emotionally and sexually attracted to them and there was no thought that crossed my mind I was gay I remember going to a leisure center with my mum at around 7 or 8 and I would get changed in to woman's (because i was to young to be by myself) I always found myself looking at the women and liked it when I saw them naked but when I was 9 I had to get changed in the male part and felt uncomfortable as they were all naked so Back to my story I started masterbating at a young age (around 9) and it would be over like nude chat shows on tv and stuff like that once I found porn I couldn't stop masterbating over straight and lesbian porn once I entered secoundry school I had a massive crush on this girl and couldn't stop thinking about her I also remember being very jealous when she got a boyfriend it all started when I entered year 9 a girl had asked me out (I had liked her) and I did but I was extremely shy around her in school and so I felt so shy around her I broke up with her and then she tiled a lot of people the reason why dumped her was because I was gay this made my life hell I lost so many mates but got over it .then after a while I started to question If I really was gay ? I started to test myself by watching gay porn which didn't arouse me (even when I tried to masterbate and it made me start to gag) then I'd watch lesbian porn and be aroused this would stop me obsessing for a while but it came back and my mind is saying that I didn't try tow masterbate to gay porn because you like it really so I started looking and asking on yahoo awnsers they all gave me awnsers like your probably gay/bi this made me doubt myself even more this is making me stressed and I hardly go out on the weekends incase I see a man and have sexual thoughts i try to have gay thoughts but they don't feel rightI'm also having grounal responses why is this happening ! I don't want to be with a man also I've been having gay dreams and these dreams I'm literally checking if I'm aroused like in my dream but I believe I'm in love with a girl at the moment ? Also I'm constantly looking at myself to see if I look gay also when I see someone and there looking at me while talking to someone I automatically think that they think I'm gay I am also worried that girls think I'm gay when I started doubting my sexuality I thought I was gay bit now I think I'm bisexual and now my mind is saying that I'm thinking that because it's true also when I look into my past and see one part that seems homosexual it will cause a spike and cause me to panic is there a reason why I'm like this ? I play rugby and when I've made contact with males I don't feel aroused but my minds telling me I am I have also seen my friends penises before and not been aroused and just laughed what shall I do ? I don't know how much I can take of this it's everyday and I feel I have to keep checking If I'm aroused is this how it's going to be for the rest of my life am I in denial ? I just hate these thoughts I also remember when I was about nine that my cousin would sit on my lap but I pretended it was a girl and now mind keeps focusing on that and won't go Please someone tell me what's wrong I also look at myself in the mirror and and see if I look gay or have a gay voice or if I give off a gay vibe