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projecting? by tiredwife on Thu Jan 31, 2019 7:08 pm
I have always heard that when being accused of something (that you aren't and haven't done,) it's more than likely because your accuser is guilty of such. I'm certain this doesn't apply to every situation, but realistically, how often does this actually happen to you?

Based upon my husband's past experiences with a wife that cheated, drank, and drugged herself into a stupor, I understand his skepticism. I however, do not do anything at all similar, don't look similar, don't act or speak similarly. We are not the same. I am his second wife.

For the past year, it has turned into him yelling, screaming "shut your f***ing mouth" "listen to me when i speak to you" "you will respect me," and things of that nature. He tells me not to talk over him, not interrupt him, and then when I ask for a moment of his time, he cuts me off and uses his hands as a "stop" gesture to end what I have to say. In all honesty, I do not feel as though my husband respects me, or cares at all about the things I say. I am a very brutally honest and blunt, and some would say pessimistic person. I believe I just know better how to prepare for situations, and expect others to disappoint me, so I work things our in such a way that I do not get disappointed. I look at life with a very real sense of what can and cannot be accomplished in a given amount of time. I am very time-oriented.
My husband tells me that I assume to much. An example:
I tell him one thing in the A.M., he forgets by lunch 5 days in a row, and tells me that he forgot every evening. I tell him the same message on the 6th day, he gets bent out of shape because "I assumed he would forget and now I am nagging." I personally do not find that nagging or assuming. It is using deductive reasoning or taking what was learned from first-hand experiences, and applying it to the situation. This is something that happens every week.

He accuses me of being childish, immature, and needing to grow the f*** up.
I do not raise my voice at him. I am the mother of his child. I keep the house running. I am overseer of all of the financials. I went to college. I make more money than him. I have two college degrees. I am a female in a predominately male professional trade, decisive, direct, and dedicated. I have more real-world experience than he does. I am literal. To the point. Callous, if you will. I do not mince words. I say exactly what the situation calls for, and I use the correct vernacular for emotions and feelings. I had to grow up fast, and by whatever means necessary, while he grew up in the same house all his life, was the youngest of three children with a stay at home mother, and overly religious upbringing, had no responsibilities, and never been told no. I do not play games. He says I do. He is the one that plays games, blatantly ignoring repeated phone calls and going out of his way to make me feel inadequate.

Really, that's just two examples..but just this morning we had the biggest blow-up of our relationship because I asked for clarification on what he meant by a statement, and it turned into very seriously hurtful words and screaming.

Any advice, folks?

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Is this Hocd anymore? by Hi12123 on Sat Apr 27, 2019 7:06 am
Sorry this is very long but please read this because i need help...
Hi, I am a 16 year old girl and have been struggling with hocd for about 2 years. It all started in 7th grade when I had an intense crush...

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projecting? by tiredwife on Thu Jan 31, 2019 7:08 pm
I have always heard that when being accused of something (that you aren't and haven't done,) it's more than likely because your accuser is guilty of such. I'm certain this doesn't apply to every situation,...

[ Continued ]

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Do I sound like an aspergirl? OCD, Tourettes, by Queencoco on Sun Jul 15, 2018 2:45 am
Hi there!
20 year old girl looking for some guidance.
I have a history of mental health issues but have never been diagnosed with anything. My dad has Tourettes with ocd and my sister has anxiety disorder....

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Shoplifting Mother!! HELP! by Greyartist on Sat Jul 14, 2018 5:13 am
Hi, this will be my first post on here and I really need some advice or help and I’m beyond desperate. My mother is a shoplifter, and I’m only a teenager and I’m the only one in the family that knows and I...

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Personality Disorder by recklesswho on Tue Jun 12, 2018 8:04 pm
I don't know whats going on with me, its getting worse and im getting tired. Im a boy, 20 years old and I can't remember as many details as I would like to remember about who and what I was before that...

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Re: Art Therapy & Addiction: As a Treatment For Substance Abuse by thegentlepath on Fri Aug 09, 2019 2:52 pm
I know this is an old post, but it is also a good post. Thank you.

Re: Personality Disorder by Snaga on Tue Jun 12, 2018 9:57 pm
Well hoping that you find someone who can help. Welcome to the blog section! Please be sure to go to hospital if you feel the immediate urge to harm yourself, also remember we have a self-harm forum...

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Re: i feel terrible by Snaga on Thu May 31, 2018 12:47 am
I'm not sure anything you did as a kid can be held against you like that in the future, juvenile records used to be sealed. Sounds as if you were doing stuff kids do, to me. Not that it was smart or advisable,...

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Re: Please Help me figure out what's wrong with me by Objectified on Fri Apr 27, 2018 9:35 am
May be you wanted to feel more important and therefore you lied so that you will get the attention you did not receive. Do you recall your parents neglecting you in any way? Or may be, were you jealous...

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Re: Please Help me figure out what's wrong with me by Snaga on Fri Apr 27, 2018 3:20 am
Hello and welcome to the forums! You might find the blogs don't get much responses, you might consider posting in one of the forums. I'm not sure which forum- you might find it better to break your story...

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