I just gave birth...to a 5-essay exam...

3600 words, which isn't a lot, but they had to be "well thought out" words... a distinct difference than my idle prattle on here

So my brain is poo.

I did manage an hour or two of lounge-lizardry...had to get my burn on (I'm ridiculously nordic... light features, but I am obsessed with trying to de-albinify myself... can anyone say SHARPAY BY 50?!) My thinking is that if I slather myself from head to toe in Oil of Olay at night I can somehow not end up looking like a 100 year old american native by 50... is that bad?

Ate more ribs (yes, more left overs) and corn on the cob for dinner. No sauce on the walls. Tonight, it seems, the preferred method of splattery was to wear the sauce... all over my shorts. Thank god I'm not in public... eating ribs (and other messy vittles) is akin to a tasmanian devil in a paint shop... no man needs to see me face first in a plate of ribs, covered in sauce up to my ear lobes. Then again, maybe this is why I am still single... hmm... one to consider. Screw that! Man vs Food.... freakin food wins... there are things with batteries to replace men, and they don't bitch at me either.

So tonight I think my couch and I have a date. It is calling my name. Time to watch the LCD and let my brain ooze out of my ears for a few hours.

The dog farm is calm atm. Someone (don't know which one) ripped stuffing out of a doggie bed pad. Apparently 2 baskets of toys and chewie bones is not enough to keep one entertained. When I said "Ok, buffoons... who pulled this stuffing out?!" the three indians sat there looking at me blankly. Yeah, go figger. Toys are strewn ALL OVER right now. This is our little game... I pick up the toys and chewies and put them in their proper baskets and within 30 minutes 50 of them appear all over the room. I swear... I am not kidding. I clean up, go to the computer and work on school stuff and the next time I look up my livingroom looks like a day care center again. Rinse and repeat. This is their game. They want to slowly drive me insane. That's ok... I love my fur kids

Well, that was my exciting Sunday. Not really the most interesting of reads, but that was today in the wild and wonderful world of Koska.

Signing off for now....
Enjoy the rest of your weekend, all
-Koshka

Today Koshka's world is sunshiny. Literally and figuratively.

Got up today at 8am with a spring in my step, worked on my midterm essays, then hopped off to the pool to lounge my lizard rear and soak up some of the vitamin D outside my door today. Can tell the hormone surge has retreated... I'm in an almost elated state. Not manic or hypo, as I usually don't experience that unless unmedicated, which I'm not. Just "bouncy," I'd say. Hate how the mood fluctuates like this based upon my hormone levels, but must admit that I do like the bubbliness that I feel for about 3 days after the end of my cycle. Wish there was a way to keep that feeling going inside my body... it's a very happy place and wish I was like this all the time.

The doggies have calmed down a bit, as they seem to be getting used to being "a pack." The first two days of doggie visits turn my two little fur kids into little spazmoids and they run around like they're on a crack high. All members of the pack are now contented, whittling away on their newest chewies that I just doled out.

Haven't felt much like eating the past few days. The week leading up to my cycle is what I refer to as my "eat the walls down" days where I get massive cravings for all forms of crap food and don't usually remember why the hell I'm wanting to eat dinners consisting of noodles or bread or potatoes until about 3 days into food-fest week. After the cycle, I swing to the other pole... not caring if I eat at all. Then when "happy days" return to me, I begin to want to eat like a normal person. Today I busted out the watermelon and pineapple (satiates the sweets cravings), am going to have bbq ribs and corn left over from the other night, and am defrosting a steak to toss on the grill tomorrow... mmmmmm... charred meat..... mmmmmm. I'm def a carnivore... would fail miserably as a vegetarian (even tho I eat tons of veggies) as I MUST have charred meat. Firm believer in protein, am I.

So that's the blather for today. Nothing fab... just finally shook off the lay-around fatassery I've been engaging in for the last week and snapped back like the rubberband I seem to be.

Looking at my toes... pogs need painted... looking like mountain lion chewed on them... time for some pog-maintenance. Maybe I shall top today off with a pedi... or do that tomorrow morning. I find that relaxing and fun.

Hope you all are having a nice weekend!
Sunshine to yooz all!!

-Koshka

Hola, peeps!
Well, fortunate for the rest of the world, this month's hormone surge has reached its apex and is now on the decline

I suddenly realized how it is that I can tell when my hormones get back in line... my sense of humor is outta control. I find EVERYTHING funny. Good grief... laugh, cry, laugh, cry. Round and round we go.

So, as I was telling LW, my house has turned into, as she so eloquently put it "DOGGIE DAYCARE." I have a wonderful weiner dog (Dachshund) named Gunther... my little German man; a neurotic mini-me (Chihuahua/Yorkie mix) named Miso... my Japanese crazy man; and a little cutie (Shih Tzu) named Buddy who is visiting us while his parents go on a 10-day cruise. Miso and Buddy are friends, as they've been together before, but the obligatory 20-minute butt-sniffing-hello session ensued when Buddy arrived. My livingroom now looks like a playpen... dog chewies and dog toys strewn about. Activity goes in spurts... atm all 3 are passed out, but in about an hour they will wake up and begin the morning wrestling session (which, for some reason, despite the fact that they are ALL neutered, seems to involve humping each other). Buddy brought his bed over. Gunther has a huge bed (I spoil my pups) and Miso has a cage that is his personal cave of safety that he loves. But what is it about doggie visits that compels them to claim each other's things? Gunther has, atm, skwoze his fat butt into Buddy's bed; Buddy took Miso's favorite spot on the couch under the blankie, which in turn, has displaced Miso... who is tiny and I have not yet located him in the mess. Of course, if I want to take a head count, all I need to do is bust out the bag of treats and I'll have all 3 of them standing at attention in front of me patiently awaiting food. Yes, folks, my house has TOTALLY gone to the dogs. But they're fun... they make me laugh. It's kinda like watching fish swim in a fish tank. Well, except that they would be 10 lb fish with fur in a livingroom, waterless tank.

So what's today's plan? Hmmm. This week I have to write 5 essays for an exam that's due on Sunday. Not a HUGE task, as I explained to LW that I can fart 2000 words in 5 seconds flat... I do have competition tho... she can do 1000...lol. I need to wipe bbq sauce off the wall next to my desk (in my infinite wisdom I attempted to eat a plate of bbq ribs at the computer last night, dropped a rib onto the plate and splatted brown sauce onto the wall... discovered this this morning as I sat here drinking my coffee wondering what the hell I got on the wall). If the sun can manage to stay out today, I'm feeling a lounge-lizard session coming on... need some Vitamin D. Other than that, dunno. Oh, yeah, nap. Daily requisite afternoon nap. Beyond THAT, dunno.

Well, sorry for falling off the edge of the earth for a while. My world is still the flat one and sometimes my ship falls off the end of it. But I do come back

Missed you all and hope you have a great end of the week!!

-Koshka

Well, I've been working on my class work like a mad woman today. Wrote a term paper in two hours, posted discussion board postings, worked on some other class stuff... pretty productive. For some reason I re-look at one of my teachers' course instructions and find out I need to be posting on the discussion boards by Wednesdays. Had to go back through all my posts and figure out which ones I busted the timeline on. Only one...thank goodness. But this little, very minor bobble sent me into this mental mudslide. This week's topics have been challenging and I'm feeling down.

Feel stupid, actually. Wonder what the hell I am doing wanting to be a Psychologist or diagnostician. Feel completely inadequate. Everyone tells me I am so smart, but do they REALLY realize how much time and effort I have to put into learning???? I feel so EFFIN stupid... like I'm a dumba$$ masquerading as a potentially intelligent person.

Know I'm being completely silly here. It hit me about 5 minutes ago that I'm about 4 days away from my "monthly gift." For god's sake... why the HELL do I have to endure this hormonally-induced bash-fest every damn month? Why do I have to get about an hour into hating myself, doubting myself and doubting everything before I realize it is hormones and then say "oh, yeah... here it comes."

Can someone please rip out my ovaries already? They've already proven to be the second most useless organs in my body... my appendix being the other. I'm childless, in my 40's and don't need these malfunctional useless organs in my body to eff with me every damn month.

Sigh.

Sorry for the pointless, down-beat rant. Just one of those days. One of those days that I have to endure every single month.

Shake out of it, Koshka!

Just finished the irritating paper. Not really a whole lot of brain power into it... hell, half the people in my class are having a hard time staying on-topic in discussions, so I'm sure my paper is "quality" for the teacher...lol.

So I finish up, then mom calls... my brother is in the hospital with spinal meningitis (he had it as a kid and apparently it was the viral kind, so he continued to carry it and it's back). Ugh. Doctors ran a buncha tests on him and just can't figure out why they can't kill his splitting headache... meningitis headaches are like migranes times a million. So he's all doped up on morphine and still crying (he has AMAZING pain tolerance, so if he's crying, this is BAD BAD BAD).

Guess I'm gonna spend the rest of the day with my fingers crossed and praying