My family problems are big. They are so big that i can`t even talk about them.

If i talk about them then i have some owner ship to them and my mothers guilty conscience, my stepfathers aggression, my brothers and sisters mental health.

It seems like everybody who mentions problems gets a responsibility!

Every time something happens in the family, it disrupts me!

I have suffocated in the peoples problems in the family, and all i want to do is get away from them.

They only want to hang their responsibilities on me!

I am a little pi**ed off today!

I had an appointment with someone, and she cancelled it at the last minute.

I know cancellation do occur but its more the nature around that acquittance that bothers me.

She has been going threw some bad times in her life and needs some support, i happened to be in the way for her quest of sympathy, and i am finding it hard to give it to her.

She complained to me that her boss was unsympathetic towards her when she told her that she had back problems. The boss made her work despite her problems and i told the boss how i felt about that.

The thing is that i get provoked because i don`t have much sympathy for my back!
I don`t have any family to take care of me, i don`t have anybody! So WHY should i take care of her?
I find her problems a liability for me and i wish i had a nice way to say it.

I find it difficult to "break up" with her because she happens to be the only friend i have.

So i am in some big problems.

Also i know that she has made agreements to me before that she never kept, she said she would phone me once, but then she never called me.

So i don`t understand why i should suddenly be so supportive?

I have lend her a back belt, heard her complaining about back pain and boss problems, i have sent an email to her boss complaining and written a letter for her job. She borrowed my pc and printer.

I can`t sound like the best friend? or maybe i do? ( i have a crappy keyboard just sayin!)

I feel as if her problems are hindering me to have a problem free life.

She is winning on this but i am using energy on something that gets me no where

She lives next door to me, so its a little to close to comfort!

Edit: 8okt
I sent an email to her trying to explain how i felt about this relationship in a nice way.
I still haven`t got any answer but maybe she hasn`t read it yet? I have tried to tell her about my problems.
I don`t think she gets it!? She feels entitled to my help.
I did try to help her for a while but then i understood that her problems were so big that i can`t get myself involved into them because of my own situation.
I have tried to explain it in a nice way, but like someone once said, "there is no good way to explain a bad thing". Rejection will always hurt no matter how you say it!

I am a little drained out! But gaining energy again

I received a unexpected visitor at my door, and some unexpected things.

Somebody came to my door asking if i wanted to be trustee where i live.
I don`t really want to be that and so i declined.
She also is a friend so i helped her out with finding somebody for the job, since its her job to find someone..
We wrote a document together, that she can hang up instead of going door to door.

Hopefully someone will volunteer!

She had back problems but that didn`t stop the board to pressure her to get a new trainee.
Since i also have some back problems i could relate to it.

She came in my flat when it looked like a mess

But hey! What do you do when somebody is in need of some help?

Out with the guns(eh..printers) and in with the burn!

(People always seem to be coming to me when their life is messy!!!?)


I just wonder if a prolaps has a minor effect then any other disease because nobody seems to be taking it very seriously!

The woman who came today had told the board manager about her back problem and got the message to continue working!?
A prolaps is very painful and you shouldn`t be stressed!

Feeling mentally drained! Am mentally drained!

Wish i didn`t have so many problems and so many explanations!
But i have and i am trying to get them down in a long letter for either to sue somebody or send it to a office?

Either way i need to get some things in the open and this is draining me out!

Wish i had a better life cause right now mine seems #######5!

Signing off! Hope i get this letter finished! Now i have eaten some preservatives with colourings so now i get migraine!

Sh*¨P!

I don`t know if you have followed up on me? Or if you have any experience with my past, so i assume you don`t!

Well the story goes something like this:

* I write something on the internet in a forum about my life vision and my beliefs. I am an atheist and last i checked this doesn`t break the law.

* After my comments in a forum i felt as if someone was following me, once i was in a shop a woman came up to me and said something that had just been said against me inside that forum.

* Now with technology i have found out who that is, and it turns out that its people who support a political party in Norway that is called Krf or Christian folk party in english.

* They have even stalked/followed me on my facebook account! (Not writing anything)

* I have looked some more and i can see some more connections here, i am a bit bafled/confused as to what exactly is going on? I have friends of a daily leader who i haven`t seen or contacted for many years and her friends(who don`t know me) have been to my FB account!!?????
So the theory about just the religious part could be both right and wrong?

* I also wrote about the daily leader on that forum but i was anonymous and so was she.



OMFGOSH!!!!

Turns out i have been followed by a man who was deeply religious on FB, i don`t know if its the same man who was following me in the forum and called me psychotic because i said i was an atheist, but i have my suspicions of it based on what he said to some atheists in FB so i blocked him. Besides i don`t even know who he is!

P.S I don`t mind that people are religious, its just when people get nasty that i block them.

It still strikes me that someone i didn`t know could mention the word psychotic to me in a conversation she said "you can get psychotic from being in this shop on a saturday". This was said to me from a strange woman in a shop, and it looked as if she had been waiting a long time to get the shoot at saying it to me!?? She was standing by a rail, talking on a mobile phone(i now think that she was filming me!??), she asked for my help with something, as to keep a conversation and make it look as if it was natural, but i didn`t find anything natural about that at all. Also i was anonymous on that forum!!! Nobody (except from a few old friends) knew who i was there.