Well careers fair was a bust. Everyone else there was about half my age (I think teaching might be out as I wanted to kill them all ). It was all about hairdressing and metal work apprenticeships for school leavers. I would say to ppl at the stalls I have 3 A levels at grade A and a medical degree - what can I do with them in your field and they would just say either I was over qualified or that would have to retrain I got a bit of useful stuff from the social care stall except they thought that I would prob be pushed towards management because of being quite highly qualified and I am not sure that is for me. The other interesting thing I looked into was medical photography and I am going to follow that up by calling the hospital and speaking to someone in that department about qualifications etc. but overall it was a bit demoralising. I did make a brooch and ring at a fashion design stall tho - which was a highlight. What I need is a careers fair for grown ups (there were 10 year old kids at this one today) where I can say these are my A levels, this is my degree what can I do with them without needing much retraining?

Feel a bit demoralised and overwhelmed atm and also have no idea how to amend my cv to a more general one.

Huge hugs

Cracked

I had my careers advice appt today - it went well and I got a bunch of advice about things to do next and areas to look into. Seems I have a bit of stuff to do like creating a CV that is not meant for medical jobs and looking at job descriptions and thinking about hours etc. Apparently there is this website that will match jobs to key words in your CV so that sounds good. Need to not run before I can walk tho but I am really thinking I could cope with a job of some kind even if it is only a few hours a week. Well one step at a time I guess - need to sort my CV first. I am also going to a skills thing next week which will hopefully be fun.

However in other news the confirmation that I am off the medical register came through. There is a possibility of going back on it in the future but it would be tough. I put a lot of myself into my training and my work and it is a big thing to say goodbye to. So will need to have a good think about that and work through it in my head.

Huge hugs to you all

Cracked

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A9HFYNITCSs

I love this song - reminds me of being a teenager and recording things off tape from the radio - good times. Oh and perching on my winndow sill smoking and blowing the smoke out the window so Mum would not catch me - how I thought I would get away with it I dont know.

I also love the video of the above - shows that perseverence works

Well i guess the reason for the title of this blog is that I am wide awake and it is the middle of the night. I think I am not going to sleep tonight - feel too wide awake to. I know it is not good but sometimes it is fun to stay up all night and see what tomorrow brings. Not so good for the BP tho I guess - oh well maybe I will feel tired soon - you never know.

As for now, I am sitting watching Friends and seeing how they are all there for each other

Well I hope that those of you who should be awake are having a good day and those who should be asleep are having nice dreams about ppl and places you love

Huge hugs

Cracked

I CANNOT STAND the Military Wives Choir. I am sure they are all very nice ppl and Gareth is a nice person too but they drive me insane. All their namby pamby versions of good songs being ruined by their arrangements and the middle of the road easy listening they provide. That is it - they have no bite. Nothing to grab you - wallpaper music. I know I should like them as they are a choir and such and they are all nice ppl who have moving life stories but I dont, sorry.

And whilst we are on it - I dont like Disney movies either. Sentimental claptrap.

:grump:

Cracked

I have booked an appt next week with a careers advisor. I am scared in a way as it is a new chapter in my life and I have not worked for so long - but I am also excited. If I could just get a small job to start off with then it would be so good for me in many ways I think. Obviously financially but also psychologically by giving me some purpose and worth work wise. I think I am ready tho it is scary. I reckon a few hours a week to start with would be good. The thing is I have no idea what I want to do - I know I want to use my brain but in what way I am not sure. My psych also pointed out, which is true, that my concentration is not great but I will talk to the adviser about all that and also say I need to be gentle to start with and also be allowed time for my appts as well. But my psych is being supportive which is really good. I actually had a really good session with her yesterday. So wish me luck please and I will let you know how it goes.

I hope that you are all well

Hugs

Cracked