Today, I feel that I'm too awake to my past and future. My thoughts are mostly consumed by pondering how long I've existed with hardly a shred of reciprocated compassion, how very little I've done at all, and how these circumstances will undoubtedly affect the rest of my life.

As of lately, I've wondered if years of this sort of deprivation can cause us to forget what it's like to be in a state where a sense of purpose is there to help push us forward regardless of how we feel. To be demotivated because you don't even remember what happiness is like. And by happiness, I don't mean just having a day where you don't feel so weighed down by your hardships, I'm speaking of a state of happiness that's authentic because it's brought about by that sense of purpose I mentioned, not just a chemical imbalance in the brain.