Friendless

Having Bipolar has pretty much made me a loner. Throughout my whole life, I've found it hard to get along with people for a long period of time.. Like, I'm alright with them for a while but then things just seem to go wrong because I get moody.

I pretty much have no friends my own age. I want to be able to text someone and say "hey wanna go out tonight" ... I live on a council estate so there are no "nice clubs" where I can go to meet people.. I joined a gym but no one really talks to other people there and it's mostly guys.

I'm 19, so I can legally drink etc..Does anyone else have any ideas on what I can do?

Volunteering is a good way to meet new people! I'm a loner myself. So I'm the best at giving this kind of advice. One thing I did to met others is join a group. I joined a local militia and we wear uniforms and do training exercises(no guns). I also joined a local volunteer police group where we mostly work with kids.

MrUnhappy wrote:Volunteering is a good way to meet new people! I'm a loner myself. So I'm the best at giving this kind of advice. One thing I did to met others is join a group. I joined a local militia and we wear uniforms and do training exercises(no guns). I also joined a local volunteer police group where we mostly work with kids.

That sounds good but I don't have much enthusiasm to deal with kids.. and the police is really hard to get into around here and it's very dangerous as I live in a rough area.

Those were just examples. Look online locally for something?

Cupcake,
My sincerest apologies for not seeing and replying to this till now. Sorry to hear how isolated you're feeling. You're absolutely right... our moods can make us VERY difficult to tolerate for long periods of time... I've lost many a friend for that very reason.

Try to maybe look into socializing in ways that fit into what you're comfortable with... for instance, I take online college courses (keeps my mind active, gives me a goal to work towards, I can do the work at my leisure and without ppl seeing me, yet I still interact online with other students and teachers). Another thing I'd looked into before I got wrapped up in classes was social support groups in my local area for ppl with social phobias. I thought it might be cool to get involved with a group who "got it" about my hangups about socializing and that I could meet with at a monthly gathering to blow the dust off my bottom and not feel pressure to look chatty. I google searched the topic (local social groups for ppl with social phobias) and actually got quite a few hits on groups that meet AND online forums. Another thing I'd considered (till classes ate all my tim...lol) was taking a ballet class or violin lessons... something to get me out of the house once a week with others who were interested in something I was.

I know you really want to socialize, but, like me, kinda need to not jump headlong into it. It's ok to take baby steps and look into things that get you interacting with others slowly... even if it starts online and ends up in situations where you're actually going out. Look for things that catch your interests and aren't overwhelming... starting small

Hugs,
Kosh

If you have a sauna/ steam room in your gym then that could work. I found the sauna to be a great place to chat. Sometimes they want to be left alone but more often then not they will talk with you. Weather, news, sports, your own interests, whatever. I never really took my conversations
to "hey want to go out tonight" level but that is only because I only wanted fun banter to kill time. I am sure if you saw the same person(s) a few times and got on a friendly basis with them it could work. It is a possibility at least. Good luck!