not too important, but would love your opinion

Good idea. That is what I would do if my place was decent enough. I did that in the past. You should buy candles and wines, it is always nice. Not too heavy a meal. Something light, like maybe fish and pastas.

So I invited her over tomorrow to my place to have seared ahi with a strawberry salsa and mixed greens and sake/plum wine...I enjoy this combination warm combined with some hot miso soup.

I found out that her roommate is a co-worker of mine. This brings up trouble in my mind. What if I ###$ up....then all my $#%^ is known by my co-workers. This scares me, yet what am I going to do, its a small town, I hate it.

Thanks for listening.....I know there are more important dealings on these forums; its nice to talk it out to even an anonymous crowd.

lol listening to pandora, 'who do I trust,' me. that who. By pastor troy.....I'm into deep south krunk atm kk. Song fits my mood.

Baalzebub wrote:So I invited her over tomorrow to my place to have seared ahi with a strawberry salsa and mixed greens and sake/plum wine...I enjoy this combination warm combined with some hot miso soup.

I found out that her roommate is a co-worker of mine. This brings up trouble in my mind. What if I ###$ up....then all my $#%^ is known by my co-workers. This scares me, yet what am I going to do, its a small town, I hate it.

Thanks for listening.....I know there are more important dealings on these forums; its nice to talk it out to even an anonymous crowd.

HI Bb

Yum, what time do you want me there?.... no wait, what? ... aaarrrh, sorry

Look at it all from her point of view, she would be happy that she has a date with you.
She has done all the leg work and now all her hard work has paid off by a dinner date.

If you make her feel special the night will be perfect.

Baalzebub wrote:What should I not say? Should I tell her I have one friend, seen as kinda boring, introverted, outcast, I live in a fantasy world; shouldn't I just say this to end the misery. But I guess that statement is why I am the way I am. I know, or have learned, that if I can get through this weird period, acceptance is pretty awesome. I want it so bad I'm forcing myself to just do it.

I'm no expert in this sort of thing but I guess just tell the truth but put a postitve spin on it, don't come across as being negative.

Also another trick I've read about is try asking questions about her that require more than a yes/no response. It will take the focus of you and she will have to keep talking. It may also show her you have a big intrest in her.

Baalzebub wrote:So I invited her over tomorrow to my place to have seared ahi with a strawberry salsa and mixed greens and sake/plum wine...I enjoy this combination warm combined with some hot miso soup.

I found out that her roommate is a co-worker of mine. This brings up trouble in my mind. What if I ###$ up....then all my $#%^ is known by my co-workers. This scares me, yet what am I going to do, its a small town, I hate it.

Thanks for listening.....I know there are more important dealings on these forums; its nice to talk it out to even an anonymous crowd.

Girls love a guy who can cook!

Your situation IS important. This is about relationships, and laying groundwork for that now could have far-reaching positive energies, and more skills, way into your future. I can hardly think of something more important than this.

Let's say your fears come true and something bad happens between you and ths girl sometime down the road. (But it most likely won't tonight--one day at a time!) And then she spills your secrets to your coworker. Your sh*t probably won't be worse than what your other coworkers already know: that you're quiet and introverted. (They probably don't project more than that--that you're an outcast and stuff--that's coming from you.) So they may find out you live in a fantasy world--big deal. At least you'll shatter one feared negative idea they have about you: They'll find out you're not boring.

Thanks everyone for the kind responses.....it's go time.

I'm not too sure if I'm more afraid of success or failure.

What do you mean? How did dinner go? Whathappenedwhathappenedwhathappened?

However this turns out, I am proud of myself for a few landmark accomplishments. I'm really not sure what type of opinion she has of me. Whenever I leave her presence it seems I start all over; like every meeting is a first date. I must remind myself of the previous episode.

The first date went without any major disaster. She liked the meal, the conversation was flowing, and I thought she may be into me.

The first accomplishment I was proud of myself for was I initiated the first kiss. This is quite the daunting task for me. This happened on our third meeting. She seems to be a quiet person like me; well I'm not quiet really, just it's my guarded position and also could be hers. This leaves me in a position that I avoid mostly, the leader, or the one that makes the plans, and so on. But she has also made suggestions, she took me out to dinner and paid, thought that was nice.

The second accomplishment I was proud of was that I was open and honest about myself.......without being too depressive sounding. I find it hard to not put myself down ...that's really something that has to change. I mean who else do you got but yourself (that sentence made it sound so easy). But she seems to be into me, or giving me a chance. I'm just finding it scary to leave my comfortable lonely dream world, and this makes me sick inside.

I'm afraid of coming off too clingy, and of course I kinda am, I want her attention. We've been close, I very much like holding another person; we held each other while watching a movie; the power of a touch is something that can bring me to tears. The smell of another human; hair.

I also tried (that's the key word) to initiate sex. But, as I thought, she declined, saying something about moving too fast before, and so on. Maybe I was to forward or quick to move in...or course I've been accused of being the other way....I don't know. I keep saying be yourself and say what you want to. Basically everything I'm telling myself to not say I try to express to her. I'm trying to use this burst of attention to bust me out of this boring ass mold I'm in. I thought I might join a gym, and yea I'm totally ######6 afraid of these places, but it seems taking care of the body is something everyone's into, and it doesn't hurt I guess.

Look at me..... I'm going to go down swinging at least.

Baalzebub wrote:However this turns out, I am proud of myself for a few landmark accomplishments. I'm really not sure what type of opinion she has of me.

You went on 3 dates... I think it's safe to say that she has a pretty good opinion of you.

Baalzebub wrote:I also tried (that's the key word) to initiate sex. But, as I thought, she declined, saying something about moving too fast before, and so on.

That's understandable from her point of view. But don't let it discourage you. You made a lot of accomplishments and everything else you described makes it seems like the dates were close to perfect. This definitely has potential, and I'm glad that your life seems to have taken a turn for the better.