Eccentric or Fashionable Clothing

First, a quick introduction since I am pretty new to these forums. (Previously just a lurker)

I am 21 years old and am a high-functioning avoidant. I have a job, but have never had a relationship or any close friends. I was seeing a psychiatrist for about 2 months, but recently stopped due to a combination of reasons. First off, I feel we reached a point where I was simply paying for an hour long conversation and wasn't progressing anymore. Secondly, work ramped up and has left me with little free time, which I actually enjoy yet hate at the same time. I enjoy it because I never feel out of place and just work all the time. Its comforting and keeps me occupied. I hate it because it means I am stuck, and cannot seek help or really even attempt to break any habits.

I don't want to bore anyone with the 500th life story post on this forum, so onto the topic at hand!


Has anyone here ever tried or considered wearing expensive either eccentric or fashionable clothing? I ask because recently I have been buying some designer clothes and have been dressing a bit more "up" than normal. It feels good to look nice, but at the same time it can be slightly uncomfortable drawing more attention than usual to oneself. I am trying to use this as an outlet of some sort to help get over some of my fears.

Basically, I get an occasional (rare) comment or the additional glance as a result of what I am wearing. This kind of forces me to have, at the very least, a tiny bit more interaction with people than I otherwise would. I am trying to get used to this, and I think this might help in a very tiny way.

Anyone tried anything like this? This is a very easy way of putting yourself into a 'slightly' uncomfortable situation in an attempt to adjust and slowly work your way to the point of breaking bad psychological processes or thought patterns. At least that is what I am hoping happens.

I don't have the money for expensive clothes. I used to dress "eccentric" in high school but I stopped because I didn't feel like I had a cool enough personality to match.

I've never had a good relationship with clothes. I went straight from my mother dressing me into a uniform of khaki pants and collared shirts, and once I hit high school I swore off of anything but t-shirts for a while. Actually, I went right back into uniform, just on my terms: jeans and a t-shirt. As I've gotten older, I've gone through phases where I attempt to be fashionable and wear things more feminine, but now I rarely even wear make-up (not even mascara, so with my blonde hair I look very plain). But I have compromised and wear fitted t-shirts and Converse instead of cross-trainers, so... small battles.

So, yes, relevance: I've gone through phases where I don't try to look as plain and unassuming as possible, but it just heightened my awareness of my appearance (and the accompanying disgust) and anxiety until it just got to be too much and I went back to minimizing how much I stand out. It didn't really change the underlying thought structures, just rubbed against them. Plus all that primping takes a long time and I am NOT a morning person.

I admire my best friend, though. She does the whole goth thing: multiple piercings, bone-white cleavage, short fire-engine red hair.

Oh, and before I forget: welcome, Waffles. Good to have you with us.

I have never been much of a fashion person, I probably don't know a thing about fashion. The only clothes I own are T-shirts and jeans, with the exclusion of some clothes I inherited from my grandfather. I suppose dressing like an old man has occurred to me before, as many people have accused me of being like "an old man", but its mainly counteracted by my extreme dislike of being too noticeable. Perhaps I may look into a new "style" sometime in the near future, as my dog recently chewed up most of my jeans >.>;

I have a really hard time dealing with clothes. I find it very hard to wear anything that's not black. I remember trying to break out of that years ago. People would comment on it and I found it annoying. It's just way easier to wear all black.

Ebontiel wrote:So, yes, relevance: I've gone through phases where I don't try to look as plain and unassuming as possible, but it just heightened my awareness of my appearance (and the accompanying disgust) and anxiety until it just got to be too much and I went back to minimizing how much I stand out. It didn't really change the underlying thought structures, just rubbed against them. Plus all that primping takes a long time and I am NOT a morning person.

Hmm, this is quite a bit different than my case. Generally, I don't feel bad about myself due to being more aware of my appearance, I simply get more anxious due to the additional attention from others. Its only uncomfortable sometimes, and other times it subsides entirely. What I want to happen is to simply rid myself of the anxiety due to this attention (at least, what feels like extra attention, even though most people probably don't even glance my way) entirely or to a significant degree. This seems like an easy approach to me, due to the fact that it doesn't require any direction action in-the-moment. I find it drastically harder to force myself to get out of the house and do something new than it is to dress up and do what I already have to do, and have been doing for a long time already.

I am also a guy, so it doesn't really take any extra time to get dressed in the morning.

Ebontiel wrote:Oh, and before I forget: welcome, Waffles. Good to have you with us.

Thanks!

I would dress however you want to dress - whatever makes you feel the most comfortable. However, I do agree that looking/dressing a bit out of the ordinary can prompt some interesting conversations, and might make people who identify with you more inclined to introduce themselves. I'm an extremely shy person, but because of my various tattoos and piercings, people often come up to me and start conversations. That's half the battle right there. But I wouldn't adopt a look just so other people will comment on it. You have to genuinely enjoy the look.

i could say im slightly fashionable and have my owwn style but nothing eccentric.