Sub consciouss self harm.

I probably do that too, not often but for the few recent years, I've made a few decisions that have a really huge impact on my life and I'm not sure they were good. and they meant quitting doing things that were central to my life and were good at least generally. So I don't really know what it was.

sorry it's not exactly an answer to you question but I think i do that too.

I have trouble making decisions to begin with. I usually rely on someone else to make a decision for me so I won't make anyone get mad at me. It's a painful feeling.

Yukinari wrote:I have trouble making decisions to begin with. I usually rely on someone else to make a decision for me so I won't make anyone get mad at me. It's a painful feeling.

I know what you mean, I probably was like that until recently. and when i finally made the desicions to change things because the reality was getting unbearable, I made lots of people mad at me. it is a painful feeling! but at least I did that.

i was wondering about the actual self-harm, like cutting, overdosing etc, does anyone does that? i know it's not typical of APD, but i've had a few bouts of cutting.

SilentAllTheseYears wrote:

Yukinari wrote:I have trouble making decisions to begin with. I usually rely on someone else to make a decision for me so I won't make anyone get mad at me. It's a painful feeling.

I know what you mean, I probably was like that until recently. and when i finally made the desicions to change things because the reality was getting unbearable, I made lots of people mad at me. it is a painful feeling! but at least I did that.

i was wondering about the actual self-harm, like cutting, overdosing etc, does anyone does that? i know it's not typical of APD, but i've had a few bouts of cutting.

I don't cut, and I know I never will. Simply seeing the sight of blood makes me nauseous.

SilentAllTheseYears wrote:i was wondering about the actual self-harm, like cutting, overdosing etc, does anyone does that? i know it's not typical of APD, but i've had a few bouts of cutting.

I don't cut but I've burned myself, helps release psychological stress and makes me relaxed after. I've also done some overdosing but stopped.

I used to, and now I can never wear short sleeves anymore; I'd suggest for anyone wanting that privilege to never go down that road.

I'm not sure, but I do not think I have done subconscious self-harm.

I do not really do any self-harm like cutting, but I have overdosed a few times, usually with the intent of killing myself. It isn't very effective for that, of course, but while I was not afraid of dying, I was definitely afraid of pain and possible consequences of failed suicide attempts with other methods.

A real life Shinji wrote:

Tujjen wrote:I'm not sure, but I do not think I have done subconscious self-harm.

I do not really do any self-harm like cutting, but I have overdosed a few times, usually with the intent of killing myself. It isn't very effective for that, of course, but while I was not afraid of dying, I was definitely afraid of pain and possible consequences of failed suicide attempts with other methods.

Yeah I've read about the possible ramifications of the various failed attempts. I don't want to be in a coma.

Yeah, bad idea, I think. Brains blow out, but still alive, doesn't really sound fun. Of course, my aunt once had to point out that overdosing could cause some bad problems too. I didn't really want to think about that. =P I'm trying to stop, now, though, well I technically have been for two years, but at least it has been many months, since I've tried anything despite some pretty intense suicidal feelings coming back.

I hope you don't have to try the suicide route. It isn't fun, a great underestimation, but I can definitely understand that temptation when your life seems so absolutely terrible.