Do you look away when you see a beautiful woman?

Whenever I see women I feel attracted to, I look the other away or pretend I haven't seen them, especially if they are looking in my direction. The reason I do this is not because I'd rather not contemplate their beauty, but because I don't want them to give me a dirty look, smirk, grimace or sneer at me. (That's just the way a lot of women have reacted after catching me showing interest in them.)

I've been this way since my mid teens when after one rejection too many it suddenly dawned upon me that women are not better than me and that given the miniscule likelihood that I'm going to attract them just by showing obvious interest in them, it was time to stop humiliating myself before them.

As an avoidant, do you identify with my avoidance of beautiful women?

Hey,

I do this all of the time too and it even extends to me just ignoring them. It's very strange though: I mean, if we find them attractive, why do we shy away from them? I think that in my case it's due to a fear of rejection: I had a crush on a girl for 13 years when I was younger, but never did anything about it.

Actually, scrap that - It's not to do with rejection because I have no fear anymore in asking girls out. Rather, I think it's just my social anxiety. I mean, I shy away from just about everyone. Perhaps it is more to do with the fact that I don't feel like I'm good enough for such beauty.

Kevin

My case is a bit different. I feel worthy of beautiful women; the problem is that beautiful women don't seem to share my way of thinking, so I don't bother trying to attract them.

Well I am afraid that they might get offended by me. I do not mind being rejected anymore, but I do mind that some girls do that in a very cruel and rude way. It did happen to me several times and I was devastated for months after that. It takes a lot of courage and effort for me to overcome my enxiety to show that I am interested, but when that happens, I do stare at them and freak them out.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oidohrB-f6o
Something like that happening to me is my worst nightmare,
public humiliation.

Another_Shinji, I think that nux bqt means that he doesn't feel like his personality matches that of these 'beautiful' women that he sees. So, if he sees it that way, he also then sees there as being no point in even trying to hook up with them.

Another_Shinji wrote:And to have it filmed and on youtube...Id live in a cave!

Actually something like that happened to me when I was a kid,
but I had behaved like that little girl in that clip and avoided interaction with one girl that liked me at that time.
I still feel guilt after so many years and can not forgive myself.
That is why it hurts so much when I get such cold treatment.

Another_Shinji wrote:How do you mean?

It means that the way women have treated me tells me that I am not as desirable to them as I thought I was.

Do you hate women, nux bqt?; or, rather, do you hold grudges against all of them because of the way a handful of them have treated you? From a purely evolutionary viewpoint, I don't think a male and female are meant to live together forever. That idea was created by the church.

Kevin

Chucky wrote:Do you hate women, nux bqt?;

no

or, rather, do you hold grudges against all of them because of the way a handful of them have treated you?

I wouldn't say I hold grudges against women as a whole. It's just that I have been bitten in the past and don't want to be bitten again. As someone else said, sometimes women reject men in a very cruel manner; it's almost like they feel insulted by the fact that some men think they actually have a chance with them. I play it safe, that's all. Better safe than sorry.