New and pretty sure AvPD

Hi SarKa

Welcome to the forum.

Seeking out treatment for AvPD is something that seems very much up to the individual. Some people are resigned to the fact that they'll never be the life and soul of the party and are relatively content on their own. Other people want to try to find better ways to cope with their everyday, including any other disorders that are also in the picture- depression etc. Personally I find the loneliness is the thing that upsets me- that everyone around me has friendships and relationships and I don't. A GP can usually refer you on to someone else for assessment. Diagnosis of a PD can take a while though- it was nearly 12 months before my therapist would firmly say I had AvPD- they need to be able to see that it is part of your everyday and it's not just an episode of something.

I know I wouldn't get past a proper interview. The few I've been through have been a disaster. All of the jobs I've held have been just right place right time, with the "interview" process being very casual and informal and "if you've got a resume can I take a look..." I have a couple of other big things I need to get done first (like sorting stuff with the bank), and then I'm thinking I'll approach a job agency which deals with clients with a disability to see if they can help me find a more appropriate job than my current one. Freelancing jobs online, like proofreading from home have also been suggested to me.

I found having a diagnosis helpful- I am on disability and without the diagnosis it wouldn't have been possible to get disability. It's also helped me understand my own behaviour better- I've spent a lot of time talking with my therapist about why I do certain things and we've been able to draw a lot of connections between my upbringing and the way I react to things now. A lot of those things I can't fix, but understanding them and why they're there has been really helpful.

Most GP's can only diagnose depression and anxiety. I sought help for my depression and anxiety long before AvPD was in the picture. Anything more complex than depression/anxiety is usually diagnosed by a psychiatrist or a clinical psychologist. My own diagnoses have all been made by my psychologist- access to a decent psychiatrist has not been possible for me. When I've brought up my self-diagnoses with him, usually in a way of "I was reading about x and a lot of it sounded really familiar to me, what do you think..." we've explored it together, and there's usually been some amount of truth in what I've honed in on. He's never outright dismissed it though.

Also, sharing with a therapist doesn't mean you have to spill absolutely everything within the space of a session. There's a lot of stuff that took me months or even years before I felt ready to discuss with my therapist. Sometimes we might have touched on an issue, but I wasn't ready to talk about it, or he could see I wasn't ready to talk about it and it's been left until another time- some of it even put on hold indefinitely.