Do you enjoy 'going out'?

Thought about asking this on the Social Phobia forum, but I'll just ask it here instead.

Are avvies a bit anhedonic?

I think depression really comes with the territory so I'm sure a lot of us are really anhedonic (loss of pleasure). It's even hard for me to stay on a task that I'm supposed to enjoy, a bit like being restless.

As for going out, meh? Not really. Depends where, if there's a lot of people with me or at the place I'm going to. There are places I'd like to go, like museums, art shops and other interesting locales but something like a restaurant full of people or somewhere really crowdy, I don't enjoy at all. I had to get therapy to handle those places and even at that, I'd rather stay at home.

I don't think going out is something a lot of people here would enjoy. I might be mistaken but that's my impression.

That's a tough one for me.

I don't like to step outside the house. Going to the workplace or a market around the corner are very hard tasks.

On the other hand, I am totally aware I'm losing my life with that. There are times when I want to meet new people, find that "special one that would make my life seem worth it", go to the gym, experience new things ... but as much as I'd like to, I "can't". I choose to stay home sitting on my couch and doing nothing, afraid of the world outside, with a billion reasons holding me back like if I were living inside a metal shell with a ball and chain.

While many of those reasons could be deemed as genuine, most of them are not.

Plus, whenever I'm outside I feel anxious and can't wait to be back home.

Auxiliary11 wrote:Are avvies a bit anhedonic?

I can't speak for everyone else but I positively am. I feel like everyone and everything in this world is boring.

Yeah , going out - I dont care for it .
I feel like Im on auto pilot ...
When I have to visit family for the holidays or a get together. I have to make a conscious effort to ask how I can help get ready (set the table ,carve the turkey , etc.) ... If I just be a wallflower like I naturally want to be , everyone will ask me whats wrong and then I get ashamed for being the center of attention or making people worry about me.

I white knuckle my way through life a lot to hide how much I want to be alone.

I want to go to the gym , I just dont dare too. Maybe if I could be there at 5 in the morning when they open I could make it work..... I feel like if I got some excersise maybe the outside world wouldnt be so boring .like , maybe thats the medicine my brain needs.

I can tolerate going out if I know all the specifics; where I'm going, what I'm doing, who's going with me, who will be wherever I'm going, but most importantly, when I will be leaving and how and when I will get back home. If I am not clear about the hows and whens of getting home, I will lose any interest I had in going out.

I used to enjoy going out with myself. To a diner, or the movies. Back in the day I used to love shopping for cd's and DVD's, but the internet has made that no longer necessary. I can't afford a meal out or even a movie these days, so I miss those little dates with myself.

Actually I went out earlier today. To check for the mail. My downstairs neighbor was talking to my landlord and I was forced to participate, briefly. I walked back into my apartment feeling as if I had just been to a really bad party.

There wasn't even many mail. The internet is a good enabler for reclusive behavior.

I used to go out with a small group of friends once in a while. It was nice to be able to present as a normal, somewhat popular person although I usually didn't actually enjoying being out. I don't have any friends anymore, but I'd like to have a best friend or girlfriend to do some things with.

I have a lot of concerns about how I'm going to get home if I go out somewhere but I do actually have a disability, so that's not so irrational. I tend to feel lonely and alienated in crowds. Probably do find most people boring and I find a lot of their bonding rituals and sociableness irritating. I am quite sociable on a one to one level though and enjoy company especially if it's a woman that I'm atracted to. I've had girlfriends but never really been part of a couple that had mutual friends and a social circle.

Auxiliary11 wrote:Thought about asking this on the Social Phobia forum, but I'll just ask it here instead.

Are avvies a bit anhedonic?

I am becoming less emotionally numb, and I am finding that I am able to enjoy myself a lot more. At first I didn't necessarily believe my therapist that when you stop showing negative emotions you also stop showing positive emotions, but now that I am processing things I am able to laugh and have fun around people. As a result, I no longer find social events emotionally draining.

I'm afraid of being outside of home, there are people outside, so I can't really enjoy going out.

But if I had to search my memory, I'd find examples of time pleasantly spent outside of home. Very rare examples, but they exist. Usually they're about dating someone. Sometimes about visiting a friend. But that was long ago.

For me it depends with who im going out. Going to the supermarket or buying clothes im fine with doing alone though, im always self concious while doing so and i see most people i see as more worthy then myself. I see them as being better at life than I am. It makes me feel bad.

I like themeparks, or cocktail bars, but only with people i feel somewhat comfortable with. The prospect of interacting with strangers scares me though, especially when i'm depressed which is almost all the time. I dread showing them the real me, the worthless me. The me that wants to hide from everything that makes me feel bad.

I did go to clubs and discotheques and I only can enjoy it when the setting/environment is interesting on a visual basis, when the music is to my taste and only when i'm with people i feel comfortable with.
With my friends (i have 2 friends) who also stay at home rather than go out, i dont really enjoy going out, because even though i'm an introvert, i do have extroverted tendencies. When people approach me i can talk with them and then i'm very sociable, even tho i dont feel comfortable about 90% of the time.
Knowing there is someone with me who i feel completely comfortable around makes it easier. Sadly I only have one person in my life a cousin, who i feel completely comfortable around. There where 2 cousins but i lost one of em which pains me still, but that's besides the point.

So long story short, in general I dont enjoy going out, it makes me too much self concious in a negative way. I used to handle this by wearing a so called mask, but projecting the person i want to be, is very much draining, because my inner feelings just dont feel the way i want to feel, even though i try so hard. Most people seem to like me though, on a social level, but in the end, knowing this doesnt matter.