* avoidant, defeatist, or just love-shy?

Hello. I'm new to these forums, and wanted to pose a simple situation upon all who care...

I've recently thought of myself being avoidant and possibly possessing an avoidant personality disorder. I share many of the traits listed at the top of this very index (the strongest being the self-perception statements and some truth to the relationships statements).

I also share a good amount of my attitude and general emotions with being defeatist, giving up to cope with something I avoided, and, therefore, "wiping the slate clean" as I see it.

This trait in my personality is very annoying (to myself only, as far as I know) because even when I would love to talk to women, I shun myself away very behaviorly and almost automatically.

I am very open-minded and independent...a very phlegmatic person in nature, too...which makes me very confused on whether or not this is a treatable issue, or whether I just have a general shyness when it comes to talking with women or strangers that I would like to get to know better.

Any replies would be most helpful.

My thoughts are that it's most important that YOU find it a problem. Sounds like you are a bit more limited than you would like to be. How functional are you when talking with women? Is that only when your behavior occurs or are there other situations? There's certainly nothing wrong with talking to someone professionally about how you're feeling. You could be right about your self-assessment. OR you might find out that you're wrong and maybe you only have tendencies.