Wrong Town

A bit over two years ago, I moved to a small town in a regionally distant area from the city I grew up in. At first I thought people here wouldn't be so unpleasant to interact with. Was I wrong. Not being a local, I am consistently scrutinized for any action I make, word I utter or expression I make. And news really does travel faster in a town in contrast to the vast, impersonal city life I took for granted. Modern technology only exacerbates the spread of news, not to mention the petty, simple interests people seem to invest in this area.

The more I have adapted to become aloof to their gawking, the further they've persisted to berate me until they can produce a reaction of gloom out of me to seemingly prove their prowess and take that to deem themselves superior to me. I've resorted to becoming a shut in. My roommate goes out to do the groceries and I order other products online. I have experience the "being watched" hunch in the past, but this feeling is more specific, and much more overwhelming. It makes me feel caged being out there more than these four walls ever will.

I know you posted this awhile ago but I can completely relate to how you feel. Like you I thought maybe the people in the small town I moved to would be more accepting but it's been the exact opposite. Nosy to the extreme and judgmental I always feel like I'm being watched and my neighbors are almost obsessed with everything I do and living in a duplex makes it even worse.

So far what I'm dealing with:

Malicious gossip being spread throughout the neighborhood about me and my family.
Violating our privacy by listening to our conversations, listening to us when using the bathroom (Sometimes I can hear laughter through the walls) Looking in our windows when the blinds are closed. Monitoring who comes goes from our apartment.
Verbal abuse, being referred to as an idiot and weird, jokes being made at my expense.
They have a history of being abusive towards other tenants, the man who lived next to them and had mental health issues was also subjected to constant verbal harassment and malicious gossip.

I'm becoming increasingly suicidal and if I don't move I may actually go through with it.