Living with a Verbally Abusive Parent

What to do to live with a verbally abusive parent? He is controlling, manipulative, mean, selfish, uncooperative, argumentative and belittling. Moving is not an option at present. [/b]

my step father was very verbally abusive. It has affected my entire life, it is very degrading and sets you up for abuse later in your life.

Are you a minor child?

'Irish'

My parents verbally abuse me constantly and moving is not an option. I'm only 15, but this has been going on for as long as I can remember. Only 2 more years until I can really leave them, but I can't help feeling constantly sad and lonely since nobody believes me and I wish that I had normal parents who actually care about me.

keno wrote:What to do to live with a verbally abusive parent? He is controlling, manipulative, mean, selfish, uncooperative, argumentative and belittling. Moving is not an option at present. [/b]

I am not telling you to do what I did at the age of 15, now I am 32 years old. I ran away from home because the abuse whas that bad.
I had no money but strangers were willing to help me, although I took risk of being caught by the police to bring me back, or being with people I did not know. Yes I was hurt and raped, so I am not advising this as an option. But maybe you can find someone to talk to, or see if you could live with another family member and explain what is going on. Talk to people you know who will listen and care. There are ways out. You do not have to stay in this abusive home because you are 15. Let someone know, that you trust, tell them what is going on, in your home. This way you have someone who can help you.

I did run away a very long time ago and I made a life for myself. However I met a lot of strange people who used drugs, not all people I met used drugs but a lot of them did. I did survive but I almost died and I am very lucky to be alive. To me it was worth getting out of the abuse I lived in and it was bad. I took Mental and Emotinal abuse from my real mom and beatings from my step dad. Mental abuse from Step Mom and it was bad. If I know what I know now I should have tried to talk someone because at the time I had no money to support myself and I wanted out of the abuse. That is all I could think about. Don't run away, just find someone you know and trust and talk to them. Don't give up hope because someone will help you, if you keep talking about your situation.

I totally understand the pain involved with this. My mother was emotinally abusive, and used to be physically abusive till I was six, but quit hitting me when I started asking her to do it again.

Growing up, she was so mean to me, I thought she was trying to poison me so I became very skinny by being afraid to eat or drink anything in our house. Everyone thought it was anorexia, and I almost died from it. I was an extremely bright child, so I realized if I she didn't kill me, I was going to kill myself. So I timidly started eating again, vowing that if I made it alive to 18, I would abandon her forever. This thought was the only thing that gave me comfort during those long hard years. When I was able to act on it as an adult, it brought me much joy to be rid of her.

The teenage years were extremely difficult, as this is when my bi-polar started to flourish and I withdrew from any activities which would keep me away from her. I had some weird behaviors as a result of my symptoms, and I was made fun of her for them. As an example, I heard demonic voices and whispered nonsensical verbal utterances to myself to distract me from them, and she would mock me.

18 comes and I graduate from high school, and I haven't spoke to her ever since. I am 28 now, and while this was really hard, but I had made peace with the fact that she was never going to be a mother to me and do nuturing mother things. She is caustic and self destructive and to continue to allow her to be part of my life would have been very detrimental to me. Instead, I have a few friends who I fall back on when times are tough. In depression, I have no one during that time so it can be really hard and I get thoughts of revenge on her for making it so hard for me to connect with other people. But I move forward, realizing its not always going to be like this.

So live with the thoght that at some point, if you choose to, you may be rid of your abusive parent for as long as you choose. I am comfortable with not ever having her in my life ever again.

yeah i'm in a similar situation. my dad constantly yells at me and calls me crappy things all the time. what really get hurt though, as i found in my ap psych class, is that verbal abuse means your usually insecure and have low self-esteem later on in life...both of these are pretty true for me