My theory on sexual deviancy and pedophiles *May Trigger*

I recently posted this as a comment on a blog where someone brought up the following idea, and I found it quite fascinating. "Type I" in the context he mentioned was in reply to an earlier comment assuming there are 2 different types of men (or older teens) attracted to boys.

Type I - Someone older (either a man or older teen) who genuinely cares for the well-being of the younger boy as a mentor and is not seeking sex, but a real emotional relationship. If sex is initiated by the boy, it would be accepted, but is not necessary for the relationship to thrive.

Type II - Someone older (be they older teen or adult) who is exclusively seeking out sex with the younger boy and doesn't care for the emotional aspects of the relationship.

Here's one of the replies:

"I agree with the fact that there are “Type I” men that would never have sex with a boy. But I also think that this attitude comes more from old prejudices and stereotypes (and also the quite valid fear from the law) than from a real conviction that sex with an adult will be harmful for the kid. It doesn’t have to be.

Sex has been demonized to an incredible degree during the last decade. People now believe that the worst, the WORST thing that could ever happen to a minor is to have sex. Even worse if it is with a partner of the same gender. I expect that kind of reaction from ignorant people, hardcore followers of the right-wing, or religious groups. Not from people from a minority that has learned first-hand from the huge perils of ignorance.

I agree with the fact that the age difference it’s a very important factor to consider, but I also think that is not an indestructible barrier. Sex between a man and a boy is not the awful, vile and destructive crime people would have you believe. It can happen. It can be done well, and still be a great, healthy and fulfilling relationship for both. If it comes naturally, and is something both people really want… well, what’s wrong with it then?

The only thing I really find wrong about it is that currently it’s labeled as a crime and can get both partners in serious legal problems that in the end are probably not worth it.

But on a relationship level, again, if it comes naturally, I don’t see anything really wrong about it. Maybe they would stay together for the rest of their lives. Or maybe the relationship fades after a few years and turns into a special, reinforced friendship. Maybe the sex was a one-time thing, derived from curiosity or any other reasons.

I’m not saying that is something easy or common, nor something anyone should be actively looking for (remember the NATURAL part?) and I believe that this kind of relationship requires a huge deal of responsibility and common sense from the older partner (whether he is 17 or 35), but in the end, I think it’s possible.

Creeps will be creeps, whether they’re after boys, girls, grown women or men. Caring people, whichever person they love or look after, are simply a different, a very different matter."


Here's my reply:

"I do feel on some level that I agree with this. Society is much too hung up and stigmatized by anything they consider "abnormal" or "deviant behavior" based on what the media tells us about such relations, and there is perhaps too much emphasis on crime itself, to say nothing of unique individual cases.

In most instances, the crime itself is often carried out by family members, and when it isn't, the offender is situational. If not, it's usually older teen boys.

I've only seen this issue grow worse as the internet holds more and more power within our society, and as lawmakers struggle to keep up by coming up with new bills to safeguard children whilst at the same time only perpetuating the problem. People who otherwise would not have committed a crime suddenly find themselves doing just that, all because of the veil of anonymity which at first glance appears safe. Their inhibitions are suddenly stripped away, and they can say and do as they please. And yet they do this honestly, perhaps because they've no other constructive outlet for their feelings. This may not entirely be their fault.

Along with this witch hunt on minor-attracted people, we brought paranoia into our cultures and it affects not only the beliefs of over-zealous adults, but those of children and teens as well. I believe that the fear of pedophilia and the like has hindered their development, whereas naturally, they would remain carefree and feel able to express themselves as they grow into their sexual identity and develop healthy relationships.

We CAN be responsible, moral people. We should not need laws to define our morality. But the moment we do, we abdicate our personal responsibility and boundaries as human beings in exchange for a system that will TELL us what to believe and how to think, and that system--if left unchecked--will be our downfall.

The results of this are quite plain to see nowadays, even as a casual observer. All I see is "that guy is a pedo!" even if an adult so much as smiles at a child or teen, or shows natural human empathy or concern if they're in trouble.

This is a grave mistake that I think will take decades to repair. People think their kids are safe and sound, but the sad fact is that their over-protection has become overbearing, and it is causing more psychological and emotional harm to our kids (and those who would otherwise not become criminals) than it is protecting them from what most adults are convinced is a rampant problem in the world.

And the only reason it is rampant is because people have become so mistrustful of each other that few are able to show the true human love and adoration they have for kids or teens without fearing imprisonment. If you so much as smile at a kid, you're labeled a pedophile. Frustration and anger due to repression are what lead to sexual deviance and acting out...not sexuality itself, and certainly not our natural human inclinations and desire to love and care for one another.

This is my theory as to why many in the gay community are promiscuous, and why we are so quick to convey a proper image of ourselves for the rest of the heterosexual world in order to gain our human rights in a system that has become so obsessed with morality that true compassion is now lying on its deathbed.

Why are kids killing themselves? They're not allowed to express any emotion aside from anger, whether it be talking openly with one another about their home lives or anything else. Bullying is now happening at catastrophic rate. God forbid they're artistically inclined, society has shown that artists are dangerous and will put too many ideas in people's heads to make them want to change the system. Kids commit suicide. God forbid they're not accepted by others because they can't lie well enough to appear perfect. Kids commit suicide.

And when our youth die, so does any hope of change for the future. This is what a mainstream, media-influenced, morality-obsessed society has chosen...a dangerous world in which few are free to be themselves until they reach adulthood and break away from their parents, if even then.

Why are record numbers of teens on antidepressants? Control. Protection, be it protection from themselves or from the outside world. It is the same for those who would otherwise be in healthy, natural relationships, be they homosexual and adult-oriented or with teens.
Gays don't get their rights, men who love boys are locked up or threatened with the boundaries of laws that have made them into the very monsters an over-protective society has molded them to be.

Sexually obsessed, because they have no proper outlet for their emotions. Psychotic, because they can't talk to a therapist about such repressed feelings without having the door slammed in their face or handcuffs slapped on.

Similarly, teens can't talk about their repressed feelings because they're only kids, society views them as weak. Talk to a therapist, you get half a dozen prescriptions for your anger and emotional conflicts that your parents falsely believe are caused by hormones or rebellious urges alone. They live in the same manner of prison.

It's getting to be a sad world indeed, where we would lock ourselves and our youth up because of what we define as protection.

It's paranoia, plain and simple. And humanity will die if we don't start turning things around soon."

Just to be clear, I wasn't trying to justify criminal behavior. I was simply attempting to offer an explanation as to why and how people might become offenders.

Any thoughts or comments on this? Does it make any sort of rational sense?

It makes sense. Unfortunately, I would be a type II.

i do not say this to offend anyone but though i agree in many ways about the points youve made, i do feel man boy relations are wrong (more like rare and against design), and to me girl man relations are still very ify. but if the child desires it... then its their mistake or success to make.

Interesting, but I may fall in the gap between Type I and II, I am attracted to younger girls solely for sexual reasons, however I am incapable of not developing a relationship first

This sounds like reductionist taxonomy. I can't speak for men into boys, but my attraction to young girls is no different to a 'normal' person's attraction to adults. Some girls are drop-dead sexy despite having ugly personalities (the chav daughters of chav mothers) and I wouldn't want any form of intimacy other than a quick sexual tryst (were I selfish enough to act on that desire); some are cute but plain and I only find myself romantically attracted to them; but in general it could be a mixture of emotions. It depends on the individual, which makes a simple taxonomic binary opposition somewhat silly, surely?